Dark Pasts
by Rainbows28
Summary: Clary Fray doesn't talk. Or well, she does, but only to two people. Her mother and brother, Jonathon. Clary's past holds horrors beyond comprehension and she's been running from them her entire life. When her family moves to Alicante, Virginia and she meets Jace. Will her demons serve to destroy her? Or will she finally fight back? AH/AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Hello lovely readers! This idea popped into my head and I thought, 'why the hell not?' so, here is an all human story with the mortal instrument characters, who I am currently bending to my will, but have no real ownership of anything.**

 **Disclaimer: Nope. Not a damn thing.**

 **Feedback determines if I continue this story or not, so please tell me what you think! Izzy/Clary friendship. Alec is gay, he's _not_ in love with Jace, though. Jonathon isn't evil, at all. This goes pretty dark in later chapters, but I assure that it is all fiction. If abuse, self-harm, or rape upset you, please proceed with caution. Although, nothing like that in this first chapter. Again, everything is fake. I made it up!**

 **On that note . . . happy reading.**

* * *

 _The kindest hearts are the ones that have experienced the most pain. The most beautiful eyes hide a world of extraordinary hurt and lies. The most damaged souls are the hardest to find._

•••

1 . . . 2 . . . 3 . . . Alarm blares.

Clary rolls over and slides the screen on her cell phone alarm, putting an end to insistent ringing, determined as all hell to wake you up from blessed sleep. Not that Clary slept, but she liked the delusion for as long as she could get it.

This morning, was one of the mornings she did not feel like going out for a run, which was unusual. Her anxiety usually only calmed when running, but this morning was _the_ morning. The morning of her first day of junior year at Idris High School. A no name school in a no name town with a bunch of no names doing no name things. Yes . . . she was bitter.

New town. New school. New fucking identity. Not that she left much of an identity behind in California. But at least in Cali she didn't have to relive the whole, 'why don't you talk?' questions. People in L.A. had long since gotten used to the redheaded freak who kept to herself and barely made eye contact let alone open her mouth.

Now, she had to go through it again. Like once wasn't scarring enough. To say the least, she wanted to crawl under a rock and not come out until she was no longer breathing, but, that seemed a tad over dramatic, even to her. _It's just school, Jon will be with you the whole time._ She reminded herself silently.

 _Don't freak. Keep calm. You will make it._ She chanted her mantra over and over again in her head until the tight swelling of anxiety loosened, allowing oxygen to flow freely into her lungs and send blood to her brain. What now? Shower, right.

Clary didn't get out from under the warm confines of her comforter for a long time. When she did, it was incredibly slow. Like slowing her pace would slow down time and prolong the time she had left between breakfast and first bell. She made fast work on her clothing and took a quick, boiling shower. Hot water always seemed to refresh her.

The water was so hot that it nearly stung, but cold water seemed like hell and luke-warm seemed extraordinarily uncomfortable. So boiling, hot, stinging water it was. Fuck, she was a freak.

•••

A knock on her door, slapped Clary from her examination of her clothes. "Clare! C'mon!" Jon's slightly groggy voice echoed through her door and she smirked.

"In a sec!" She called back, it would probably take her a lot more than a second to put her clothes on, fix her hair, and grab her bag, but by his muffled grumble he understood that. She heard footsteps getting farther and farther away and when she could no longer hear anything, she turned to her closet and let the towel drop.

A fresh pair of panties, a bra, a pair of ripped maroon jeans, and a form fitting black sweater later and she was dressed. As she slipped on a pair of black vans and stared at herself in the mirror, she tried to decide just how she should style her hair. _He_ always liked it down. She didn't really like it down anymore. So she went with a side French braid that ended just at her left breast. She nodded, she looked good.

After grabbing her bag and phone, she left her room and jogged down the stairs. She found Jon and her mother in the kitchen. Jon stuffing his face with Twinkies and their mother casually sipping coffee while reading the newspaper.

"Alright, honey. Have everything you need?" Jocelyn asked, giving her daughter a wide smile, but Clary could see the dark patches under her eyes. She wasn't sleeping. None of them were. Hopefully this move would turn out to be for the best. Clary just nodded and reached into the fridge, pulling out the OJ and pouring herself a glass. Just as she set the carton down, Jon lifted it to his mouth and sucked back, most likely, the entire thing.

He proved her suspicions when he tossed the carton away and then released a loud belch. Both females froze and looked up at him. He shrugged and smiled unapologetically. Typical Jonathon.

"Let's go, red." He sang and grabbed his binder, kissing his mother on the cheek before walking out of the kitchen. Clary hugged her mom.

"Have a nice day." She whispered and Clary knew she wanted to tell her to make friends, but Jocelyn learned a long time ago that this wasn't something Clary would ever be doing. _Ever_.

Clary smiled tightly and turned, grabbing her bag before following in the direction Jonathon had gone.

"Dolly is currently in the shop, so we walk or we bus it." Jon said, referring to his car, as Clary walked out onto the porch. Jon leaped from the ledge of the porch railing and landed gracefully, nearly ten feet away. Clary rolled her eyes at Jon's spider-monkey tendencies. Seriously, the guy wasn't human.

"We can walk . . . how far?" She asked and he winced.

"Five miles." He answered and she glanced at her clock phone, yeah, they'd never make it in time. They were already going to be the center of attention, no need to add tardiness to the list of all the, 'look at me.' qualities.

"Bus it." She answered and he nodded, leading her down to the bus stop he must have scouted over the weekend. Jon was always prepared, for anything and everything. He was a protective fucker, but in the end he was sweet and fluffy. Large as a bear, but when you knew him, when he loved you. He was a teddy bear, all the way. Unlike Sebastian, his twin brother. Seb died three years ago. Clary shuddered in remembrance.

After about a four minute walk in the dark, Clary noted at few outlines of bodies with book bags. All standing near a stop sign. None of them standing together, but all waiting for the same thing. Separate in a world they shared. Belonging, just not to each other.

Not one of them took notice or seemed to care about the two new arrivals and Clary did her best to keep her head down and her eyes pinned to the ground. Jon started to pace in short motions. Patience wasn't his virtue.

"Jace, hurry the fuck up!" A loud female voice yelled and it drew Clary's attention. Her eyes danced up to see two figures walking quickly toward the bus stop. Down the street directly across from them, Clary noticed a bus turning down. It's large flashing light signaling their transportation arrival. Father behind the two figures was a larger one. Walking at a leisurely pace as if he had all of the time in the world.

"Yeah, you see, Iz, not truly in any fucking hurry to go listen to teachers bitch and moan about paychecks all day. So, calm your shit!" A smooth, deep masculine voice erupted from the figure behind the two who had arrived at the stop, just as the bus released its stop sign and opened its doors.

The three figures that had already been standing here when Clary and Jon arrived got on quickly as did the girl and boy who had just arrived. Jon was next, but Clary didn't move.

"Clare." Jon said and the guy who had been walking slowly reached the curb, Clary moved and Jon gave her a look, asking her 'what the fuck?' that was. She honestly didn't know, she just didn't want him to miss the bus. It was weird, because she didn't even know the guy's name or what he looked like or even who the hell he was. She just didn't want him to miss the bus. And she truly didn't understand why.

Clary took a seat in the middle of the bus and Jon sat next to her, by the window. She almost felt bad. He was six foot three and it was probably uncomfortable walking on the bus, let alone having to fold his entire body to accustom himself to the small area where the legs could go. But it _was_ Jon and if he had a fucking problem with it, he would tell her . . . maybe.

"Thank you."

Clary's entire body tensed, every muscle and cell in her being coiled in alertness at the sound of the voice in her ear, warm breath fanning across the side of her neck. She hadn't even noticed him walk by. She turned her head to the side and he was leaning over the back of her seat, smiling at her. A smile that looked entirely too fake and entirely too charming. One that probably got him the reputation of a wham, bam, thank you ma'am kind of guy. He definitely had the whole drop-dead gorgeous face thing going on and if his large broad shoulders hunched over was any indication, he had the body too.

He was the type Clary stayed very far away from. They were dangerous. Especially the pretty ones. Whoever said beauty was purity is stupid as fuck. To Clary, the beautiful ones were the ones that you had to look out for, because even Lucifer was an angel.

"I'm Jace, beautiful, and you are?" He asked. _Beautiful_. The compliment meant and affected her a lot more than it should have. No one. _No one_ , had ever called her beautiful. Well, her mom, but she was far too bias. It sent a flutter in her chest that pissed her off so much, she stood from her seat and sat angrily in the closest seat to the front. Causing a gorgeous brunette to very nearly lose her mascara. Clary caught it swiftly, just before it could screech across her face.

The brunette did, however, release a squeal of surprise. She turned to Clary, who stared at her, waiting for the bitchy comment or slap across the face, she'd gotten both at one time or another. However, this girl did none of those things. She _laughed_ slightly.

"Nice catch." She chuckled and Clary pulled the mascara back and handed it to her. Offering an apologetic glance.

"I'm Isabelle." She said and Clary just nodded. When Clary didn't answer, Isabelle's eyes dipped down to the necklace around Clary's neck.

"Clary?" She asked and Clary just nodded, reaching up to grip the necklace her grandmother had given her on her tenth birthday. She had never taken it off and most time, forgot it even hung there. Isabelle smiled.

"My friends call me Izzy." She chirped and Clary suddenly felt a rise of bitchiness, but she couldn't talk. She can't. Talking let people in. Talking hurt people. She couldn't hurt anyone. She couldn't bring anyone else into this so-called life she lived.

Mom and Jon were different, they _knew_ everything. She couldn't hide from them, no matter how much she wanted to, but she _could_ hide from others. She could be safe, without a voice, but most importantly, she could keep everyone else around her safe, too.

"So . . . where are you from?" Izzy asked and Clary looked at her hands, wondering briefly why in the fuck she wasn't moving.

"Okay, cool, um. Across the country?" Izzy asked and Clary nodded.

"That sucks. I would literally kill my parents if they did that. It must be hard, the big a move, but don't worry. Stick with me and you'll be all good." Izzy winked and shock filled Clary's veins. This girl was being nice. Okay, Clary was confused. Izzy laughed at what was most likely a confusion marred face.

"My brothers say I talk too much and you don't seem to talk at all. So I guess we'll balance each other out. Besides, I don't really have any girlfriends and you don't seem like a bitch, so we'll get along _just_ fine." Clary didn't know what surprised her more, the fact that this girl didn't have _tons_ of girlfriends or the fact that she wanted to be Clary's friend. The bus stopped.

"Do you have a schedule yet?" Izzy asked and Clary nodded, reaching into her bag and handing it to Izzy. Izzy read the entire thing and then squealed.

"Okay, we have first, second, fourth, and sixth together, but you have _everything_ with Jace and he's a jackass, but he's good with helping people." She chirped and Clary had a feeling that Izzy was _always_ happy.

"Jace! You have to show Clary to her third, fifth, and seventh class and if you don't and you do anything to hurt my girl, I will cut your balls!" Izzy screamed as she twisted in her seat.

"First of all, what the fuck are you talking about? Second, who's Clary? And Izzy, if you go near my motherfucking balls, I will destroy _all_ of your shitty glittery dresses!" Jace yelled right back and the bus driver sighed in his annoyance, but said nothing, while soft, tired snickers ran around the bus.

"The fuck you will and Clary is my girly here." Izzy grinned, nudging Clary and Clary turned to see Jon and Jace sitting casually side by side.

"Ah, hey, red." Jace nodded his chin and Clary just stared at him, before turning around and facing the front, blinking rapidly. He was _really_ pretty. Inhumanly so, with his deep golden eyes that seemed to swirl like molten lava. The strong, sharp jaw, straight nose, full lips, and light arched eyebrows. Then there was the hair. Oh god, the hair. Golden like the son, falling like silk to the nape of his neck reminding her of a lion's mane. Yes, he reminded her of a lion. A lion always on alert, always searching for prey.

Unlike most boys in high school with slightly unkempt long hair, as if their male genes didn't know how to properly take care of a long cut, his was shiny and obviously well taken care of. Washed, but not like he spent much more time other than running his fingers through it. Clary liked it and she found that weirder than all shit.

"I'll show her around." Jace's voice reached her ears and Izzy chirped happily landing with a thump next to Clary. Izzy had the body of a dancer, tall and slim, with grace and beauty etched into every crease and crevice. Clary smiled at her new friend and Izzy winked.

The silence was comfortable, but Clary still kept on alert, she still kept her guard up. She didn't know Izzy and she didn't trust people she didn't know, hell, she barely trusted the people she did know. And when everything went to hell, Clary would walk away unscathed . . . she hoped.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Heeeey guys! I got reviews and so quickly, that's fucking awesome, man! Feedback is needed to keep this story breathing. Oh and I finally figured out exactly how I'm diagnosing Clary with her not talking to actual people, turns out her situation is actually a thing . . .**

 **Disclaimer: Sadly, still nothing.**

 **Please enjoy!**

* * *

Clary sat in her fifth period class with Jace tapping his pen impatiently next to her. Clary's arms were crossed over her chest as she glared at the insistent tapping. She nudged Jace and the tapping stalled, he looked at her and she gave him a look to knock it the fuck off. He stared at her for a moment, deep eyes boring into hers.

"Tell me to stop." He says sweetly, in a soft tone that only she could hear, but she didn't. At all. She turned her head away and the tapping started up again. Jace was a good guy, Clary understood this, but if he didn't stop trying to get her to talk she was going to grab that damn pencil and shove it down his weirdly attractive throat.

Jace had pulled her away from the company of Izzy during the end of second period, only to escort her to her classes for the remainder of the day. He had talked to her, most of the time just yes or no questions, but every now and then he would slip in a question that to answer would take more than a simple shake of the head.

He hadn't teased her or gotten angry, he easily and confidently changed the subject. Clary was sure she knew more about him then she did herself at the moment. His favorite color is green or red, he can't decide. He is addicted to pancakes at three in the morning, preferably coconut from Taki's, not that Clary understood what that meant. He's never had a girlfriend, but apparently his 'friends' are really starting to get far too clingy. Clary had rolled her eyes at this and wanted to give him a smartass comment back, but she refrained. Then she found it shocking that she had to try to refrain.

Her medical diagnosis of SM (selective muteness) clearly states that the anxiety gathered from her PTSD doesn't allow her to gain the courage to talk to someone other than her family members. It was crystal clear, completely true, if the past twelve years of her life were any indication. So, why did she find herself wanting to talk to him and Izzy? She didn't know. And worse, she didn't want to know.

"Clary!" Jace sang, snapping Clary from her thoughts. She looked up at him and his massive frame looked over her. He was on the football team and the boxing team, he was obviously massive. Six foot four of pure masculine muscle. Broad shoulders, biceps that very nearly doubled hers. Long powerful legs, and a ripped chest. So basically Greek god material. It served to both amuse and piss her off.

His hair was long and she'd never really liked long hair on guys, but on him she absolutely loved it. What she didn't love, was his close proximity to her. "Class is over, red. Where'd you go?" He asked softly, now leaning _over_ her with his hands on either side of her desk. The muscles and veins popped out on his forearms as he squeezed the wood and rocked forward. He had nice arms.

Wait, no. He doesn't. At all. God, she was losing her mind. Her hands pushed on his shoulders as she slid out of her desk, casting him a nearly annoyed glance. She grabbed her bag and Jace lead her through the partly empty hallways, just as they got to the cafeteria and Jace went to say something, a large breasted blonde jumped in front of them.

Clary blinked and briefly wondered if her boobs were real. Clary didn't have a small chest, but this girl looked as if she'd shoved basketballs into her too tight tank top. "Hi, Jace . . ." Blondie purred. Clary wished it didn't sound so sexual. Then she immediately cursed herself. _Five hours, Clare. You've known this guy for only five hours and you're already getting possessive, that's healthy._

Clary frowned at her own thoughts, "Hey, Kaelie." Jace said slowly as if he were trying to make sure that was actually her name. Clary's lips twitched, even though she realized how much of a douche bag that made him.

"What are you doing?" She leaned forward slightly and Jace very nearly winced, Clary cringed at the sight of her breasts, Jesus.

"Walking or trying to." Jace mumbled, rubbing the back of his head and shifting his weight. Clary found the fact that this guy was intimidated by this girl, one he could most likely rip in half using her own boobs, very amusing.

"Well, why don't we get out of here?" She asked. _Was she serious?_ Clary wanted to ask. Clary was new and most definitely not his girlfriend, but still. She was walking with him. It was kind of bitchy and far too arrogant, if nothing else.

"Nah, I'm still good, Kae, but I'll talk to you later." Jace said, placing a hand on the small of Clary's back and leading them both away. When they were about four feet from Kaelie, Clary wiggled way from Jace's touch. It wasn't uncomfortable, she just wished it was.

Jon sat at a table with Izzy, her brother Alec, Magnus Bane, and a lot of guys in varsity jackets. God, had she walked in on the breakfast club? This wasn't her scene. This was Jon's scene. She numbly sat in a chair next to Jon and he cast her a curious glance. She ignored him and Jace grabbed a chair, spinning it and gripping the back as he sat next to her.

"I see bicycle, still has a thing for the blonde prince." Magnus said, not looking up from his nail filing with Isabelle's nails. He filed her nails. It was . . . Oddly sweet.

Clary nudged her brother under the table, wanting to know what that meant. "Bicycle?" Jon asked for his sister and Magnus sighs with a shrug.

"That girl has been with anything and everything. Literally. I'm sure plastic has even made the list." Magnus sighs and Clary her nearly choked on nothing. Jon leaned back and hummed.

"And the basketball sized tits?" He asked and Jace laughed, shaking his head.

"Present from Daddy last summer. And if you're going to fuck her, beware, she's batshit crazy." Jace said with a shrug and Clary scoffed under her breath.

"I can handle crazy." Jon said and Clary outright scoffed at that.

"What? I _can_." He drawls and she shook her head, alertness of other people's presence making her skittish and silent.

"Yes I can and I'll bet you for it." He says and she could tell they had the entire table's amused attention. Clary nodded and shrugged, meeting his eyes for the terms.

"I fuck her by Friday and you have to . . . Get me out of that shit mom wants to do Sunday." He says and Clary frowned.

"What shit?" Izzy asks and Jon shrugs.

"Church. Don't ask." Then he looks back at Clary. Clary didn't technically want to go either, actually she was sure it was the absolute last thing on this planet she wanted to do. There was no God. The preachers were full of bullshit. What made people want to go sit for nearly an hour and listen to them preach fucking gibberish that no one even listens to in the first place? Clary didn't know, she did know that it was pure insanity.

Clary leaned back and shook her head. "Fine, then I suppose no bet and that I'm right? I can handle crazy. Say it, Clare." He says, mischief flashing his vision. Jon was getting on her nerves and not just that, he was trying to get on her nerves.

She leaned forward, "I'm going to cut you, if you don't shut the fuck up." She murmured quietly. Jon smirked and nodded.

"Okay, Clare." He says and Clary leaned back. Jace and Izzy both stared at her in shock. Jon huffs.

"Selective muteness, guys. She can talk to me and my mom, but anyone else and it's a no go. Medical diagnosis. She can't help it. Drop it or I will make you eat your own teeth." Jon flashed the table his million dollar smile.

"You are seriously scary." Alec mumbled and Jonathan thanked him. Clary wasn't entirely too pissed off that he decided to share that with them, it might just make Jace back off slightly, because she had a feeling that if he didn't, she was going to end up cursing him to hell in loud speech.

Jace leaned back and frowned at his hands. Clary tore her gaze from him and to her brother, "Hey, I have tryouts today and then I'm doing shit after school, I need you to cover for me with mom, okay?" He asked and Clary glared at him, she didn't want to cover for him, she wanted to go home and try to catch up on twelve years worth of sleepless nights.

"You do that and I get you out of this church fuckery." He says and her glares softens. Then she nods. Jon grins and leans back in his seat. Well, she's been waiting twelve years for rest, it won't kill her to wait much longer.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Another Chapter! Yay!**

 **I loved writing this, seriously. Lots of Clace! I also had a question for you, do you think she should start talking to Jace or wait longer? Feedback is needed like air!**

 **Disclaimer: NO!**

 **Happy reading . . .**

* * *

After sixth period, Clary lost sight of Jace and Jon. Izzy had hugged her and told her firmly that she had to meet the group directly after school in the courtyard. Clary had nodded and now she was alone. She had no idea where the hell she was supposed to go and because of her stupid 'condition' she couldn't inform Izzy that Jace was nowhere to be found.

Clary walked through the empty halls, a panic seizing her chest as she continued to look around. Not knowing where she was going. Tears filled her eyes, she felt pathetic and childish, but that feeling of absolute helplessness had her in its claws and was currently squeezing. Her throat became scratchy and she leaned against the wall. Was she seriously having a panic attack because she couldn't find her classroom? Yes, yes she was.

"Clary." His voice sounded far away, even though he was about four feet from her. His easy relieved smile disappeared as he took in her face. Like he knew she was freaking out, when in reality, she was probably still as a statue.

"Hey." His voice was soft.

"What's up? You okay?" He asked bending to her eye level. She swallowed and shrugged.

"I'm sorry for leaving, I figured that Izzy would have showed you where Garroway is. Or at least to the gym. You didn't show, so I came to find you. You're really far away." He smiled slightly, even though there was worry etched into his pretty eyes. Then it hit her, what he was doing. Calming her. He was trying to keep her focused on her surroundings. Her chest squeezed in a completely different way at that realization.

She smiled brightly at him and shrugged. "You get lost?" He joked, eyes still tense. She nodded, briefly meeting his gaze.

"Well it's all good now, Jace the blonde knight is here to save you." He winked and her lips twitched in amusement. She cocked an eyebrow in question. He shrugged.

"I sleep around a lot." He confessed, sheepishly.

She had absolutely no idea why he was telling her this, but her body was suddenly on alert. She swore, if he was propositioning her, he was going to get a knee between his legs. _Please, don't be that guy._ She begged silently.

"Okay, you look freaked out. Let me explain. I sleep around a lot, but I don't talk about it with the guys. I don't do locker room talk. I actually hold respect for girls and their privacy, so I keep my mouth shut. Anyways, they call me white knight because of it and Magnus is the only one capable of getting away with calling me prince, which he does because of my hair." Jace winked and she cocked her head to the side in interest. That was a very . . . Honest answer.

Clary didn't know what she had expected, but that wasn't it. She pressed her lips together and frowned. "What?" He asked and she stared at him.

"Why does Magnus get away with it?" He guessed slowly and she nodded, her relief nearly palpable. Jace smirked.

"I've known the guy since birth, we grew up in the same foster homes. I kind of love him. But don't ever tell him that, because I will deny it." Jace said with mock seriousness.

A million questions suddenly filled her mind and the desire to ask nearly overwhelmed her. A sudden thought hit her, and she thought it was really stupid, but . . .

She glanced down and noticed he was wearing sweats and a t-shirt, obviously fifth period is gym. She noticed his phone in his pocket. Going with the idea she grabbed her own phone and went to her contacts, which only had two people in it, and pulled up a new page.

She showed it to him and he immediately typed in his number. She pulled up a texting window and pushed his body away from hers. He had a tendency to stand too close and she had a tendency to enjoy it, that needed to stop.

She typed the message and impulsively hit send.

Her: _You two are close?_

The question was innocent. She needed to start out innocent. She didn't understand this weird attraction or draw to him, but she needed to slow it down before it engulfed her in a way she couldn't control. She was in control right now, and that's how it needed to stay.

Not four seconds later and his phone beeped. His lips twitched and he reached inside his sweats and pulled it out. He went to type but she tapped his wrist and he looked up.

Her: _When we're together, you talk and I type. It's all I got right now._

His phone beeped again and his answer was immediately from his lips. "Yeah, we're close. He's currently trying to hide his relationship with Alec from me, it's kind of straining us because of the white lies he tells, but yeah, I'd die for the guy." She believed him.

Her: _Izzy and Alec are your adopted siblings?_

He nodded at the text, "Yeah, we we're fostered to them at age eleven and they adopted Magnus and I at age thirteen. They have a little boy, Max. He's fucking awesome. Love that kid too, love all of them, though. Not close to anyone truly, but Magnus, but they all get me. So it's cool." He nods and Clary nods back at him, slowly.

Her: _Class now?_

He smiles and nods, "Yeah, red, class now."

They both turn and walk toward the gym. Not touching, but both extremely aware of the other's close proximity.

* * *

Clary didn't have clothes to dress out, which she was relieved with, until Jace offered Izzy's clothes. Clary frowned as she changed into Izzy's super short black running shorts. Clary was a few inches taller than Izzy, so the fact that her shorts did the job of covering just her behind, shouldn't have surprised her in the least. The t-shirt was a little bit too long, so Clary tied it behind her back, revealing a patch of her flat stomach.

She sighed and before exiting, she sent a quick text to Jace.

Her: _My legs are longer than, Izzy's, jackass._

She places her phone in her locker, before exiting the empty locker room and walking outside. Jace stood there, leaning against the brick wall, confusion marring his features. His eyes slowly took in her legs and realization dawned. His smile turned lazy.

"Oh." He concludes and she glares.

"C'mon, Clary, it doesn't look bad at all. Besides you don't have an inch of fat on your body, so no fucking self-consciousness." He chastises pointing a finger at her. She gives him a mock salute and a sarcastic roll of her eyes. He grins from ear to ear.

She starts to fidget and they make it to the group. The coach was distracted, but Clary caught the wolf whistle directed at her and the snickers that followed. She kept her eyes on the ground, feeling humiliation burn through her like a blade of fire.

"Blackthorn." Jace said, cutting off the snickering group. A brown haired boy, who had delivered the wolf whistle looked up at Jace easily, a smile still etched onto his features.

"Lightwood?" He returned and Jace smiled tightly.

"Do you like your lips?" Jace asked and everyone cast him a glance while Blackthorn gained a dumbfounded look across his features. He glanced at his boys before frowning at Jace.

"What's your fucking point, Jace?" The boy snapped and Clary questioned his sanity for a moment, not only did Jace have size on him, but he also had width. One shouldn't talk to another like that if said person could kill you with their bare hands.

"My fucking point, Ian, is if that sound exits your lips directed at her again. I will rip them off and I just wanted to make your preference on the subject known." Jace snarls and for the first time since meeting him, he scared Clary. She wasn't scared for her own physical safety, but more along the lines scared of the obvious danger lurking behind the pretty eyes.

Ian lost all visible color in his face and he cleared his throat, looking pointedly away. When that little moment ended and everyone looked toward the front. The coach was watching the exchange with unconcealed boredom. "Are you two done with the testosterone display? Can I get on with my class?" He asked, his eyes firmly on Jace.

"Yes, coach." Both boys say at the exact same time. Jace's voice was slightly tense while Ian's wavered, before he cleared his throat.

"Good to know, today is an easy day. I want two laps around the track and then you guys are free to go." Coach said and everyone moved to their starting line. Clary rolled her shoulders and cracked her neck, before glaring at Jace, who was staring straight ahead. Not at her.

She looked toward the front and calmed her breathing, allowing her body to relax in the anticipation of the first sprint. Clary calculated that it would take her four minutes to complete both of the laps. The whistle blew and she took off.

* * *

Clary finished before most were even off their first lap. Three minutes and forty seconds. She beat Jace and she was kind of surprised by that. The coach, Luke Garroway gave her a look of astonishment as she walked past him. She didn't stop.

She changed back into her regular clothes and put Izzy's back into her locker before leaving. She froze as her eyes took in Jace, fully dressed and waiting against the wall in front of her. "You beat the school record. In fact, you beat the damn county record." He said and she shrugged.

Her: _Bet you're curious to see what it's like when I actually try._

She winked when he looked up from his phone. He grinned easily, "I think I like it when you're flirty." He gave her a wink of his own and he looked damn good doing it too. _Oh, did he now? Well, too fucking bad!_

She smiled sickly sweet and he frowned, "You're pissed at me." He realized and she looked away from him, scowling.

"Wow, shit, Clary." He grabbed her upper arm gently to still her step. She didn't look at him, as she shrugged his hand away.

"Is this about that little prick, Ian? Listen, I know I kind of went big brother-." She cut him off by whipping out her phone.

Her: _First off, Jon is my big brother, not you. Secondly, you did not 'kind of' do anything. You FREAKED. See all caps, just so you know how bad it was. And third, Jace, Jon does not go all possessive ape shit when a guy does something I don't like, he glares at them, and he calmly threatens them._

She huffed at the end of her silent rant and pressed send. He was grinning the entire time he read the fucking thing and she was glaring, arms crossed and feeling very much like a child scolding a bigger child.

"You're right, I'm sorry. Blackthorn and I have a pissy relationship as it is. I just didn't like the look his wolf call put on your face." He says softly and she stares at him. Then his eyes grew wide and innocent and he stuck his bottom lip out a fraction of a centimeter.

"Forgive me?" He asks, looking like a little lion cub. She internally cursed their connection, because she did forgive him. How could she not? Dammit, she was losing control and she wasn't even noticing how much.

She nodded and sighed. He grinned and fell into step with her. "Don't worry, my awesomeness prevents beautiful women form staying mad at me, don't feel bad." He smirked at her death glare. There that word was again, beautiful. She continued to deny how much she fucking enjoyed him calling her that.

 _He's just being nice. He probably feels bad for you or something. Don't read to much into it, guys like him are too good for damaged girls like you._

The tiny little insecure voice whispered inside her head and just like every time it decided to speak, she listened. Jace's voice snapped her from her thoughts and made her smile.

"C'mon, I'm going to introduce you to the awesomeness of Taki's."


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: Another Chapter! Yay! I _love_ this story, seriously, guys. **

**Okay, question: Should Clary talk to Jace? I'm going with yes, but I want your opinion too! :)**

 **Disclaimer: God, guys, I wish! But sadly everything belongs to the talented Cassandra Claire!**

 **Okay, feedback is needed for this story to continue. I just want to send a shout-out to _Cheshire15._ Love that you loooove this! **

**Thank you so much for the reviews guys! Keep them coming for more chapters! :)**

 **Happy Reading . . .**

* * *

Clary and Jace sat in a rather large booth in the back of a little quaint restaurant, known as Taki's. Clary liked it. It was . . . homey. Which was a strange feeling to get from a restaurant, but still. Clary nudged Jace and he glanced at her, just as his phone buzzed.

Her: _I told Izzy I'd meet her in the courtyard after school. Jon is going to flip._

He shrugged, "I texted all of them to meet us at Taki's. Keep calm. Everything is okay." He smiled and she glanced at him. They sat rather close and the fact that he invited others explained why he was sitting directly next to her with his arm thrown casually across her seat. He was sitting so that there was the least amount of distance between them. Which meant that he wasn't touching her, but she could still feel his body heat. She liked it. About as much as she hated it.

Perhaps she should have stuck to her original plan, her _life_ plan of no friends. Or no anything else involving another person that doesn't share her blood. Clary new immediately when her brother entered the restaurant. Not just because he called her name, but because he was Jon. They had been trapped for two years together in a darkened cell. Her body was just _wired_ to feel his.

He took a seat next to her and gave her his, 'what the fuck?' look while Izzy, Alec, and Magnus shoved him to the side. Jon crawled, yes, _crawled_ over Jace so that he sat in between them. His arm shoved Jace's away and he looked down at Clary.

"What the hell?" He asked and she shrugged, glancing up at him.

"Everything okay, Jon?" Jace asked and he was ignored. Clary nudged Jonathon, a little annoyed at her brother's meanness. Just because she hated the fact that she was gaining friends and losing control, didn't mean she didn't secretly want to keep them. Jon was different, he was never in a shortage of friends. He didn't understand her absolute hatred for other people and her undeniable need for human contact, other than what she got at home.

"What are we doing here? Did this weirdo do something to you?" Jon asked and Clary face palmed herself while Jace choked on nothing.

"What the fuck, man?" Jace hissed, yeah, he didn't like that. Clary moved and cupped Jon's ear, whispering into it.

"Stop." She begged in a pained whisper.

"I want to be here." She whispered even softer. Her stupid SM worked in an oddly strange way. Her brain told her when it was okay to talk. It was okay to talk in public as long as she was alone with Jon or her mother. It was okay to talk at home. It was not okay to talk surrounded by a bunch of people. She was starting to question if maybe her diagnosis had changed in the last five years since she got it.

Jon frowned and leaned back as she sat again. Jon cast Jace a glance, "Sorry." He says curtly and Jace scoffs under his breath. Clary sighs harshly before digging through her bag and pulling out her sketch book. She hands the image over to Izzy. As soon as Isabelle looked at it, she gasped. Her eyes took in every intricate detail of the design.

"Clary! When – How – I don't get it." She says and Clary shifted in her seat before grabbing her phone.

Her: _I'm a good listener. I heard you freaking out about the face make-up for your first home game of the season. So I drew one for you._

Jace handed Izzy the phone as the waitress arrived. Jon ordered two cokes swiftly and dismissively before turning his attention to Clary, "You're . . . texting him?" Jon asked and Clary ignored her brother. Watching Isabelle's reaction. Izzy pulls out her own phone and, most likely types in Clary's number, before tossing Jace's phone dismissively back at him.

"Wait, correction, you're texting them?" Jon was getting impatient and Clary turned her attention with a growl, before standing and storming out of the restaurant. Jon followed. They ended up in an alley and Jon raised his arms to the side and gave her a look.

"What the fuck is going on, Clary? You've known them for not even a day and you're texting him? And letting him talk to you? And now you're texting Izzy. I don't understand. When we got out, you didn't talk to me, hell you didn't even look at me for ten months. And then when you did look at me, it took you another four to even open your mouth. So, what the fuck is going on?" He demanded and she stared up at him.

Jon and Clary were trapped in that hell hole when Jon was eleven and Clary was ten. Both getting out two years later and they both came out having experienced pain and trauma like neither had even known existed. Jon took to self-harm in dealing with it and Clary took to not speaking.

Jon's abuse only started when he eleven. Clary's started when she was six and it ended when she was twelve. Six years to his two. His was only ever physical and psychological. He never got the sexual or emotional abuse that she suffered at the hands of the two people who were supposed to protect her the most.

He had to watch her get raped. She had to watch him get beaten. They were connected forever and the fact that she was connecting quicker with Jace and Izzy than she had with him, hurt him. He showed anger, but she saw hurt.

"I don't know." She finally answered and he scoffed.

"You don't know?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yes. I have found myself trying to refrain from talking to them. Actually, I think I can, I just won't. I don't understand. I like him. I don't want to, but I do." She says with a shrug.

"Are you attracted to him?" He asked, keeping his face void of any emotion. Clary frowned.

"No . . . yes. I don't know." She sputtered and he sighed.

"Clary, listen. You deserve that, you know that right? The relationship, romantic or friendship. You deserve those things." He said slowly, as if talking to a child and she flinched, not at his tone, but at his words.

"Jon." She shook her head quickly, wrapping her arms tightly around her middle.

"I'm broken. Damaged. Dirty. Used. Disgusting." She wasn't able to finish with anymore adjectives.

"The fuck you are. They are dirty and disgusting and first of all Clary, last I checked for people to be _used_ the sex had to be consensual." He grumbled and Clary rolled her eyes at his logic.

"You know that's fucking bullshit. And Jon, I know you and mom don't want me to feel this way, but I do. I mean, what the fuck? I get along with Jace, I perhaps start talking to him. I get close and I start to want him, but he's not going to reciprocate." She says and Jon raised an eyebrow.

"Uh, little sister, when was the last time a guy walked you to your classes and wasn't a complete douche bag? Do you think guys, who don't like the girls, go around and _text_ them for communication?" Jon squinted at her in disbelief.

"He's just being nice." She recovered.

"No, he's in the starting stages of becoming pussy-whipped." Jon explained.

"It's pity." Clary deflected.

"No, he doesn't know anything about you, to pity you. Besides, if he did pity you, would he have told you that he's adopted?" Jon asked and Clary's eyes whipped up.

"Were you . . . were you _spying_ on me, Jonathon?" Clary hissed and Jon shifted his weight.

"Yes and no. I was skipping last period, because I had geometry and I started walking around the school. I heard Jace having a conversation with himself and then I noticed you. Look I'm sorry, but you guys seemed cozy, so there was no way in fuck I was interrupting. Awkwardness isn't my thing, sis, you know that." He says and she huffs.

"Then you walk away, dumbass." She said and he nodded.

"Yeah, I was about to, but then he said that he slept around and you looked like you were about to go into a catatonic state, so I got ready to attack. Then he explained and for fucks sake, the fucker was actually being truthful. I couldn't believe it. Locker room talk is my favorite part of the fucking day." He murmurs, almost to himself and Clary was still pissed off.

"You _spied_ on me, Jon." She said, giving him a look and a realization dawned on him. His lips thinned and he winced.

"Okay . . . yeah, but you weren't like . . . naked, Clare." He blurted and she continued to just stare.

"That doesn't fucking matter, you spied, that's an invasion of trust and privacy. And it's wrong in regards to Jace. What he told me, you weren't meant to fucking know." Oh yes, she was pissed.

"Okay, I see we're protective of the wonderful white knight." Jon hissed, not liking it. Clary moved so fast and her hand collided with the side of his face.

"Jace is my friend. I don't know why and it scares the living shit out of me, but you will be nice and I swear to god, Jonathon Christopher Morgenstern, if you in anyway use the information you know about him wrongly, I will _never_ speak to you again. Call my motherfucking bluff, brother." Clary shoved past him and back into the restaurant. He didn't follow her. She wasn't surprised.

•••

"Are you hungry?" Jace whispered in her ear and she shook her head. He frowned, but nodded. She slumped back against the booth and just as the waitress disappeared with everyone's order, she was dosed with a bunch of glitter. She glanced down at her chest that were covered in silver, shiny flecks and her sweater that it was sticking to.

She looked up to see Magnus innocently typing on his phone. She leaned forward and Magnus didn't react. She looked over to see Izzy, covering her mouth. Jace was outright laughing his ass off right next to her and Alec was smirking. Magnus, however, was calm and innocent. She kicked him under the table and he looked up.

"Yes, dear red?" He asked and she motioned toward her chest.

"That _is_ a very nice pair of boobs; natural?" He asked and her lips parted, while Jace choked on his laughter, going into a full blown coughing fit. Clary nodded dismissively and then motioned to her chest and glitter again.

"Uh, 32C?" He questioned and her lips parted, okay, she had absolutely no idea how he knew that, but she didn't really care.

She glared at him and he sighed, "Glitter makes everything better and you looked down, so I thought, why not sprinkle her with some of my magic? Duh!" Magnus exclaimed and Clary's lips twitched.

"Did I get it into your bra? Because Jace could help you get it out." Magnus said.

"Magnus." Jace's voice was warning and Magnus shrugged innocently.

He did get it into her bra, but she wasn't about to admit that. "Clary." Izzy murmured and Clary looked over.

"I was just wondering . . . you know, if you could come over to my place Friday and help with the whole face paint thing. Magnus is a good artist and he could help you, but I _really_ want you to do it. What do you say?" Izzy asked, bouncing in her seat. Clary stared at her, blinking a few times.

Then she nodded slowly and Izzy squealed, launching herself over Jace and hugging Clary, " _Awesome_ , then you can sleep over and join us at Pandemonium. During the day we can go shopping and then we can get ready together. It's going to be awesome!" She squealed and Clary frowned.

"Pandemonium is a club." Jace confirmed and Clary frowned deeper, before shaking her head.

"Oh no! It's all ages, club, safe swear." Izzy nodded quickly and Clary didn't look like she believed her.

"We'll be there." Alec said, giving his sister a warning look.

"Shit happens, but it's not that bad." Magnus waved his hand and Clary shifted her weight, before smiling with a nod. She didn't want to go, but she did want to spend time with Izzy. So, she would go. For Izzy.

"Yay!" Izzy sat back and the food was put down in front of them. Clary took in a deep breath before glancing over at Jace's coconut pancakes. They did look really good. She stared down at Jon's coke, a guilt hit her stomach. What was she doing? She didn't know these people or at least she hadn't known them for a long time. Jon was her brother. Her protector. And she'd chosen them over him . . . no, she sighed, she'd chosen all of it. Jon would get over it.

Jace had cut his pancakes in half and piled one half on a separate plate, before getting rid of his bacon and setting it down right in front of Clary, "Eat, oh and you have to use the warm syrup, not a lot, just enough." He said with an affirmative nod. Clary glanced up, to see Izzy grinning at her dish, sharing a look with Alec and Magnus. Oh boy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Last Chapter for the day! Yay! (That rhymed ;)"**

 **Anyways . . . Tell me what you think! Love you all!**

 **Happy Reading :) . . .**

* * *

Jon and Clary had been avoiding each other for the past week. Jocelyn currently glared at the both of them in their kitchen. Both felt it, both ignored it. Their mother shook her head and slammed her coffee cup down, "Make up. I hate this." She snapped.

"That is a mother's order." She pointed her finger sternly at them and both just stared with blank faces.

"Clary has the right to connect with others, Jonathon." Jocelyn sighed and he grunted.

"I know." He mumbled and Clary glanced at him.

" _And_ , last I checked you've had friends other than her before." Jocelyn reminded him and he grunted again.

"She chose them over me." He hissed and Clary huffed.

"No I didn't. I just get along with them. I like Jace and Izzy and Alec and Magnus and they don't treat me like an invalid!" Clary screamed, shoving away from the counter and turning her back to her family. She ran her fingers through her pony-tail.

"Yeah, Jace." Jon huffed and Clary spun.

"Why are you so fucking jealous, huh? Last I checked you weren't the brother who wanted to fuck me." Clary hissed and Jon's arm slammed out so fast, taking the coffee mug and cereal bowls with it, they shattered against the wall and Jocelyn jumped onto the counter, edging away from her son. Jon snarled and glared at Clary. Clary stared at the mess. Stunned.

"I'm not motherfucking jealous like that, Clary." Jon snapped, disgust and disbelief marring his facial features. He swallowed, as if holding off bile.

"No, you're right. I'm sorry. You're worried because I've never had a positive male in my life other than you. You're worried that Jace will be able to protect me so I won't need you anymore and you know what? It's bullshit." Clary hissed, before grabbing her bag and storming out of the kitchen and her house.

Clary got to the bus stop and immediately Izzy walked toward her. "What's wrong?" She asked, blocking Clary from view. Clary was confused until Izzy's hands came up and wiped her tears. Clary spun and Izzy followed quickly.

"Clary? What happened?" Izzy asked and Clary sobbed as they both continued down the street. Izzy's lips quivered as Clary's slumped against a brick wall and slid down.

The brunette knelt next to her friend, wrapping her arms around Clary's shoulder. Izzy had never dealt with this. When Jace first came to live with them he didn't talk, but it was more out of spite than anything else. Jon told her that Clary physically couldn't over an anxiety disorder. It sent a wave of pain for the redhead through Izzy. Not pity, which relieved her to no end, but sympathy and the need to make her feel normal.

Izzy noticed Jon walking briskly toward them and Izzy moved, shielding Clary from him. "No Jon. You're upsetting her, I just fucking know it." Izzy hissed and Jon squatted quickly next to her while Clary continued to sob uncontrollably, clutching Izzy's shoulders.

"Izzy, we've been through shit. Shit you couldn't possibly imagine and we came out stronger together for it. Damaged, but stronger and right now, I've been a complete moron for the past week because I'm jealous that your brother is going to take her away and she's been the only thing keeping me sane for as long as I can remember. Now, she's currently having a panic attack and the fact that you can touch her means you're extremely special to her, but right now, I need to take care of shit. You get me?" Jon asked.

"Jace wouldn't take her away." Izzy whispered, still holding Clary close. Jon sighed.

"I know, but he can protect her and if he protects her than what the fuck am I good for? I realize this is stupid, but I can't help my emotions. I got it, go to the bus, I'll get her to school. Okay?" He asked and Izzy searched his eyes. They were green, a brilliant green not like Clary's electric emerald, but just as beautiful with tiny little golden flecks. She blinked a few times as they searched each other.

"Will she ever talk to me?" Izzy whispered and Jon stared at her intently.

"It might take some more time, but I have no doubt about it. You're very special to her. You still have my number?" He asked. Like she could lose it.

She nodded, anyway. "Text me your address and I'll have her at your house by three, but Izzy, she's still freaking out, baby. Let her go, I've got her. You get me?" He asked and she swallowed, hard, before nodding.

"I got you." She whispered and they traded her over. Jon lifted her up and Izzy stood, rubbing her palms on her thighs.

"I know it's only been like four days, but I love her. Is that weird?" Izzy asked, wincing and Jon snickered.

"You've literally spent every waking moment with her. No, it's not weird." Jon said and she nodded, giving her friend one last glance.

"Please . . . just make it better." Izzy begged and Jon glanced over to see Jace and Alec standing about fifty feet away, with Magnus pacing behind them.

"Okay." Jon looked away from Jace and smiled at Izzy, before turning and walking back down the street with his sister tucked carefully in his arms. She was long, so he had to bend her body gently to get her comfortable, but when he did, he held on tight. He needed to fix this. They both did.

•••

Clary sat next to Jon in his black truck, Dolly. She never understood why he was determined to call her this, but she never said anything. "You're right, about Jace and my insecurities. I shouldn't have spied and I shouldn't have gotten so mad. I'm just used to having you all for myself. I never thought I'd ever have to share you again . . ." He trailed off looking out the window.

Clary's phone buzzed.

Him: _You okay, beautiful?_

A feeling of calmness washed over her along with a near giddiness. She pushed it back.

Her: _Talk later._

She turned off her phone and placed it in her back pocket. Then she turned her attention to him. "You like him." Jon concluded and Clary laughed, ironically.

"Yeah. Jon, I'm not here to talk about my feelings for Jace. I could be fucking in love with him and I'd still need you. You get me and maybe he gets me too, but he doesn't know everything. Neither does Izzy. You're my big brother. You're my best friend, it hurts to think that you think I could possibly choose someone over you." She mumbled and leaned her head against Dolly's head rest.

"You like him." Jon said again and Clary threw her hands up in the air, was he even listening to her?

"Yes, damn you. I like him. So what?" She snapped and Jon shrugged.

"You've spent this entire week with him. Eating lunch with him. Spending all of your gym time with him. He makes you laugh. You like him. I'm just worried that you're going to fall in love with him. I don't want you to get hurt." He said and Clary sighed.

"Little too late and Jace wouldn't hurt me." She didn't technically know if that was true, her heart told her no, but her mind . . .

"Oh I know, that's not what I'm worried about." Jon said, shocking the hell out of her.

"Then what are you worried about?" Clary asks, stunned and Jon shrugged.

"I'm worried, that you're going to over think things, like always and then you're going to push him away, subsequently hurting yourself in the backlash." Jon sighed and Clary slumped in her seat, looking back at the window.

That was most likely the obvious ending to all of this, "And you need me, to help you not do that and to wipe the tears when the anxiety becomes too much. See, big brother is always needed." Jon grinned easily and placed his hands behind his head, locking his fingers together and leaning back casually.

Clary glared and punch him in the side, he gasped and flinched away, "Fucking hell, Clary!" Jon exclaimed and she hissed.

"Fuck you, Jon. I will always need you and last I checked, I was the one with personality issues, you just like to take a knife to your skin." Clary couldn't stop herself fast enough and her eyes bulged as the ramifications of what she just said seeped into her mind.

"Jon – I . . ." Clary trailed off, lips parted.

"That was insensitive, Clare." Jon said, his voice surprisingly calm.

"And last I checked, you have taken a knife to your skin as well." He said and she winced.

"You know that's not what I meant. I don't judge. I don't like it, but I don't judge. And you stopped. I shouldn't have said anything." Clary whispered softly and Jon sighed, before holding out his pinky.

"Even?" He asked and she swallowed, relieved, before locking her pinky with his.

"Even." She agreed and they released each other, before leaning back in comfortable silence.

•••

Clary stared at the large house in front of her. "They forgot to mention how fucking rich they were." Jon commented as he stared at the house, only about a block from their own, but it was as if they entered into a completely different world.

The house was four stories and large, encompassing most likely half an acre. Clary really didn't want to see the backyard for fear of a pool. She _loved_ pools. She didn't love swimming in front of others. Clary sighed and pushed open the door.

"It's not as big as the one we grew up in though." Jon commented and he was right about that, their house was about four-thousand square foot with five acres surrounding it, smack dab in the middle of nowhere. Clary wanted to either cry or laugh, perhaps both.

They walked up the large steps, "Ten bucks says there's a butler." He said and Clary's lips twitched as she shook her head.

"No judging, just because we don't flaunt our money anymore Jon, doesn't mean we aren't rich. You know full well mom's hiding millions." Clary muttered and Jon snorted.

"Then why aren't we living in the White House?" Jon grumbled and Clary laughed.

"Oh puh-lease, you know mom wouldn't flaunt it for the sake of the human race. She won't ever be put in that stereotype, again. One guess as to why, big brother." Clary said, with a sarcastic smile and Jon said nothing in return.

Clary rang the doorbell, "Bet China is jealous of that dong." Jon grumbled. He was bitter about the subject, Clary never really understood why, but she guessed it had something to do with their father. She liked to stay far away from that subject, so asking Jon was out of every question.

The door opened and a boy of about eight stared up at them, fixing his glasses. Jon smirked. "They're hiring young." He said and Clary rolled her eyes.

"Hey, little man, what's up?" Jon asked, holding up a fist and the boy stared at it, before blushing about ten shades of red. Clary had the urge to aww, but the boy quickly recovered and hi-fived Jon's fist.

"That's works to. We're making that a thing, bro." Jon winked and the boy grinned.

"I'm Max! You must be Jon! Izzy talks about you all the time!" The little boy squealed and Clary frowned at that. It wouldn't be the first time a girl tried to get close to Clary for her brother. Holy hell.

Jon frowned, "I bet it was just Clary." Jon said and Max shook his head.

"No, Clary is her best friend, but Izzy says you're the cutest boy. Jace, Alec, and Maggie are threatening to tell you that-." The boy stopped talking and then winced, obviously realizing _he_ wasn't supposed to say anything, either.

"Max!" A woman called from the inside and suddenly Jace appeared, he wore a pair of jeans and nothing else. Clary's throat went completely dry. He was sculpted. Cut, without a trace of fat on his body. Ridges and crevices she found she wanted to trace with her tongue.

 _Oh my god! He's turning you into a sexual being!_

This kind of pissed Clary off. She frowned and looked away from his sculpted pecs and golden skin as the boys nodded to one another. ""I told him Izzy thought he was the cutest boy in the _whole_ world!" Max chirped and Izzy appeared, nearly slamming into the door. Her entire face red as a tomato.

She laughed awkwardly, "Max, go away." Izzy said, sweetly to her little brother and Max huffed.

"It's not my fault you want to marry him and have his babies." He looked to Clary while Izzy turned a certain shade of purple that made Clary think they should get her some medical attention.

"But just so you know, I _don't_ know what that means. If mom asks." Max whispered loudly to Clary and she winked in return. The little boy grinned and turned, running off. Izzy was trying to speak, but nothing was coming out of her mouth.

"He has such a vivid imagination." Izzy coughed after a moment.

"No, he's just got ears, Iz." Jace said, leaning against his door frame on an elbow with one hand shoved into his pocket. Clary stared at the twin ropes of muscle forming a V on his lower abdomen from the perfectly cut six pack. The boy was _so_ done working out. If he was looking to achieve something, he'd achieved it. Big time.

Clary shifted her weight and Jon nudged her. She looked away swiftly from Jace's bare chest, feeling the heat crawl up her neck. When she glanced back at Jace, she took in the small grin tugging at the corner of his lips, letting her know that he caught her ogling him. Fuck.

"Well, this night is starting off just _swell_." Jon chirped and Izzy groaned along with Clary.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: Hiiiiii! Whew, okay so I like this chapter and there are some things toward the end that I'm not quite sure about so let me know what you think!**

 **Disclaimer: NO!**

 **Happy Reading :) . . . Remember reviews bring chapters faster! . . .**

* * *

Clary smiled as Izzy stared at the ground, "You know, Iz. If I actually ever planned on having kids one day. You would most definitely be my go-to girl." Jon winked and Izzy flushed deeper.

"Insensitive jackass." Clary mumbled and Izzy glanced up at her, confusion and curiosity marring her pretty features.

"I am not!" Jon exploded and Jace smirked.

"Yes you are." Jace returned and Jon scoffed.

"I'm just trying to break the motherfucking awkward tension. We've been standing out here for twenty minutes trying not to ogle one another. Put on a damn shirt, you muscle bound freak and invite us in." Jon huffed and Jace rolled his eyes. Jon was so blunt. No reservations. Clary rolled her own eyes. He had the amount of boundaries Max did. Jesus.

"Come in." Izzy mumbled and moved to the side while Jon slid in. Clary gripped Izzy's wrist before dragging the brunette toward a staircase. Clary waved at the boys and both girls jogged up the steps.

"Well, I'm hurt! I wanted to discuss those baby making terms with you, Isabelle!" Jon called after them and Izzy whimpered.

"Oh god." She moaned, leading Clary down another hallway. The redhead giggled and Izzy huffed.

"None of that. Listen, I know how girls can be when you have a cute brother and I just wanted to let you know that I'm not using you or anything. Okay?" She asked and Clary inquired her with curiosity. What was with these guys? Did they have mind reading abilities that she didn't know about? Oh god, she hoped not. The good thing about Izzy's confession, was the Clary believed her.

Clary grew up around pathological liars and mastermind deceivers. She could see right through others. She was trained by the best to do so.

She smiled at Izzy and the girl grinned in return. "Good! Alright, only four other girls on the team need the make-up for our routine. With me its five in all. There's Maia, Aline, Emma, Kaelie, and me!" Izzy chirped and Clary did a double take.

She grabbed Izzy's arm and gave her a look. "What? What's wrong?" Izzy asked and Clary reached inside her pocket and grabbed her phone. She opened the note document and typed.

Her: _Kaelie?_

She showed the phone to Izzy and the brunette's lips thinned before she winced. "Um . . . Yeah? Do you have a problem with her?" Izzy asked worriedly and Clary frowned, no, not unless you count death glares that promise pain all week. The girl seriously did not like Clary hanging out with Jace so much. It was a little pathetic if you thought about it.

Clary shook her head, not wanting to cause trouble and Izzy nodded, "Cool, but Magnus can do her make-up, anyway, okay?" Izzy chirped and Clary nodded, relieved.

They entered a room then, four girls and Magnus lounged about, none of them wearing pants, not even Magnus. And Clary was sure he had the best legs out of them all. _This officially just got weird._ Clary thought to herself.

"Guys this is Clary." Izzy chirped and Clary waved. Kaelie rolled her eyes while a blonde and brunette waved back with smiles. A girl with chocolate brown skin walked over to her.

"Did you make the design?" She asked and Clary nodded.

"Girl, it's fucking awesome. No joke. You got all of our school colors in one design and it's not over the top. I'm seriously jealous." She winked and Izzy smirked.

"Clary this is Maia. Maia, this is Clary. The one you've been fangirling about for the last two hours. That's Emma and Aline, you know Magnus and Kaelie." Izzy said. Emma was the tall willowy blonde and Aline was the petite brunette. All of the girls were cliché cheerleaders. Perfect bodies, chirpy attitudes. Except Maia, she gave off a laid back type of vibe and Kaelie just seemed to be a pure bitch.

Clary immediately felt awkward, even though the air wasn't. She swallowed it back and got started on the face paint. The school colors were sky blue, white, and gold. On the left side of the face a blue paint covered the top half of the face with a white line around the edge. Almost like highlight. On the right side of the face. A golden, flower like design twirled around the side of the eye. It was pretty, Clary really did think she did a good job.

After showing Magnus how to do it on Izzy and Maia, which lasted about two hours, she left the room in search of Jon. She found him in the kitchen with Jace, Alec, Max, and two adults with brown hair and blue eyes, just like their children. Jon's eyes met Clary and the older woman turned with a wide, bright smile. It seemed genuine.

"Hi, you must be Clary. It's so nice to meet you, I'm Maryse." Before Clary could blink the woman had her wrapped in a hug. Every cell in Clary's body burst into uncomfortable flames that seemed to drown her. Her skin crawled with the unfamiliar touch and it took everything in her to stay still and not fight for the four seconds Maryse hugged her.

The woman pulled back, smiling oblivious. Jon stared down at his glass, casting Clary a glance. He knew that probably cost her the world. Jon had read research that talked about women survivors and how they were most likely only to be uncomfortable when touched by the opposite sex. But Clary really didn't have any reason to trust her own sex. Neither did Jon. He was sketchy around everyone, he just didn't have to worry about bursting into invisible flames every time he was touched by a stranger. Clary described it in a way that made him feel sick.

The monsters had not only taken her innocence and childhood, but they succeeded in taking away one of the most basic things. The need for human contact. That made him sick. He watched Clary smile. It was fake and very nearly pained. Jon noticed that Maryse was a toucher. He was going to need to have a private conversation with that woman. He'd be polite, but he was going to flat out inform her that touching his sister wasn't a motherfucking option.

Maryse finally released Clary and her eyes found Jace, he was frowning at his adoptive mother before casting a glance toward Clary. He noticed. Oh god, had they all noticed? "Are you hungry?" Maryse asked and Clary shook her head no with another forced smile, she was getting scarily good at that.

Clary looked at Jon and walked toward him, "Sup, red?" He asked and she just stared at him. Then she shrugged.

"Clary?" Max asked and she looked up at him, her smile was not forced.

"Why don't you talk?" He asked bluntly and everything fell silent. Clary was sure his parents had forgotten to breathe.

"Max." Maryse chided and he frowned, before looking at Clary with wide, far too innocent, blue eyes, and pushing his glasses up his nose. He shrugged.

"I just want to know. Izzy says she can talk to her brother and mommy, but no one else. Can you talk to me?" Max chirped, looking immensely excited about the possibility.

"Sorry little man. It's only us." Jon said, flashing Max a smile.

"Well . . . Okay. Does it hurt to talk?" Max asked.

"Max go wash up for dinner, now." His father said, sternly and Clary frowned at the masculine voice of superiority. She never trusted the dominance that came with that position. Man of the house. Power like that could go to a person's head. She also didn't like how obediently Max listened. Like a robot. Like all kids were good for, was biding by their parents wishes.

"I'm sorry about that Clary, he's a very curious boy." Maryse says and Jace makes a noise of bewilderment behind them. Maryse casts him a glance. Clary shrugs, letting the woman know that she wasn't offended. She actually felt kind of bad. She squeezed Jon's shoulder before leaving the kitchen and in the direction she heard Max.

She found him washing his hands. She glanced around and didn't see anyone. "Max." Clary said and the boy very nearly toppled over. He looked up at her, stunned. Then his face split into a wide smile.

"You can talk!" He exclaimed happily and she put a finger to her lips.

"Do you know how powerful a voice can be?" She asked the little boy and he frowned.

"Like loud?" He asked and she shrugged.

"Sure, but it can also be very dangerous, which is why you have to be careful about what you say." Clary explained and Max smiled widely.

"Of course, Clary! But why are you talking to me? Jace said he really wants you to talk to him, but you won't. So, why me?" He chirped and she shrugged.

"You're not dangerous. Let's keep this between us, okay?" She asked and Max nodded quickly before giving her a quick hug and then bolting away. Clary swallowed. Kids held an innocence no one in the world could ever understand and overtime that innocence fades as the actual horrors and evils of the world become known. Clary wasn't scared of kids. She was scared of the people they grew up to be.

Kids were like a limbo for her, they were the only ones that didn't make her want to run and hide.


	7. Chapter 7

Football games were loud. That was the first thing Clary noticed. The next few things were that they were long and boring. If it weren't for Jon explaining the plays and Izzy coming over to enthusiastically talk for the two minute break she got every ten minutes, Clary would have hauled ass a while ago. Then there was Jace . . .

Who in the hell knew that football uniforms could be so damn hot? Well, Clary did. Because they were . . . Hot that is. Clary currently watched as Jace sprinted down the field, easily scoring his fifth touchdown that night. Clary now understood why he was so popular. He had the appearance of a God and he was the Adonis of the football field. Couldn't he just be, short and hideous? That was shallow . . . Clary frowned. The boy was making her shallow, that pissed her off. He seemed to be very good at that.

Then there was the whole standing around. Grr . . . "Morgenstern!" Coach Luke called and both Clary and Jon looked up.

"Oh good, you both answer to that. Listen, I saw you at tryouts Jon and I could use you on my team. Clary I need you on my track team." Luke said with a simple shrug and Clary just stared at him.

She shook her head no and Luke's face fell. "If this is about the whole talking thing. You won't need to. All I need is for you to run." Luke smiled and again Clary was dumb struck. Did small towns give people a reason to have absolutely no boundaries? She really didn't know.

"Thanks, Coach, but my sister doesn't join school teams." Jon grumbled and Luke frowned.

"Well, that's a damn shame. Your speed is phenomenal and it looks great on college transcripts." Luke pitched and Clary blinked at him. If only he knew why her speed was so quick. The human instincts are wired into two modes. Fight and flight. Clary is programmed for flight. Has been since she was a little girl. Running was second nature. She could do it for hours at top speed if need be. And her top speed, that was fucking fast.

"Clare you want to join the track team?" Jon asked and Clary didn't answer immediately like he'd expected. Luke's eyes lit up.

"We do meets twice a month. Every two weeks and I would have you run the full 400. We'd train three days after school and you wouldn't be required to take gym. Some of my athletes take it anyways, but that's mainly boys who are cooped up with so much energy." He explains. Like Jace. Clary thought.

The fact of the matter was, Clary wasn't a teammate. She never had been and she never would be. She wasn't reliable. Her anxiety made it nearly impossible to even be surrounded by a small crowd, surrounded by hundreds would kill her. She was surrounded by hundreds now, but none were looking at her. The center of attention or any attention was what set her panic off. It's what brought back the memories of sickening voices, alcohol soaked breath, cameras, and restraints. Her neck suddenly ached and she rolled it, reminding herself that she could move.

She shook her head firmly at Luke, "Sorry man, no means no. I, on the other hand, would absolutely love to be on the team." Jon said and Luke tore his gaze from Clary to smile easily at Jon.

"Great, let's talk positions." The two guys walked off, going deep into a conversation that Clary would have had no chance of following.

She was alone and she was bored. Before she could go home or try to find Jon, someone bumped into her from behind. Her nerves went haywire and she flinched, her eyes blinking so hard they hurt. She spun and her eyes met Ian Blackthorn. He gave her a double take before frowning, like she had bumped into him, and not the other way around.

"Sorry." He snapped sarcastically and she had the urge to tell him to go to hell, but her anxiety clenched her stomach and tightened her throat. She looked toward the ground, feeling like a coward. A broken coward.

"Ohhhhh." He drawled, his voice bordering on cruel.

"I heard you didn't talk, Morgenstern, I just wasn't quite sure." He sneered and her heart went from pounding in her chest, to full blown jack hammering in her ears as Ian took a step closer to her. She looked up and met his eyes, they were dead. Completely and utterly lifeless. Horror hit her. They looked familiar. Those eyes. Had they always been . . . Green?

No, they hadn't. Her horror slowly turned into realization. And when that settled, shock was next. His hair was different. He'd filled out. Up close, he didn't look so . . . Non-threatening. He wasn't as tall as Jon or Jace, but he still had several inches on her. Perhaps six foot two. He wasn't broad, but lean and cut.

Those eyes, those green pools of nothingness. Like chips of colored ice, floating in a black abyss. She'd seen those eyes so many times. They were the core of her nightmares. They belonged to the one who destroyed everything.

"Sebastian." Clary breathed and he grinned. The grin was so wide, it split his face and she was reminded of 'The Joker' from Batman. Except Sebastian held the unnatural beauty that all of the Mortanstern's did. His was just frightening.

"Little sister, how have you been? It's been what? Five years? Long time." He purred.

Clary didn't know what she was supposed to do. Her father had shot him. She'd watched. There was blood and he wasn't moving. He should not exist. Oh god, this wasn't happening.

"Clary, the game is over, do come with me." Sebastian/Ian whatever the hell his name is, pulled her toward the locker room. Inside the team and the cheerleaders were getting a pep talk from Luke for their win. Jon smiled as he stood next to Jace. Sebastian clucked his tongue and Luke did a double take.

"Hey guys." Luke said easily and Sebastian smiled.

"Ian, what are you doing in here?" Julian Blackthorn asked and Sebastian stared at him and then he winced, as if he gave a damn.

"Oh right . . . You're the brother. Ooh, listen, man. I'm sorry." He said and everyone gained a dumbfounded look on their face while Alec, Izzy, Jace, and Magnus glanced at Clary.

"But I kind of killed that dude. He looked like me, so I thought, why the hell not? And another thing, either I'm really good or you people get stupider as the years go by." Sebastian was relatively freaking all of them out. He turned his head to Clary.

"Clare, sweetie, please do go lock the doors." He said against her ear and she stared straight ahead until he trailed a hard object up her back and pressed into her skin. Gun.

"Jon." Clary said and Jonathan stared at her, frowning.

"Ian, what the fuck, man?" Jordan asked while Maia stood close to him. Sebastian snorted. Then he raised his gun and fired at Jordan. Screams erupted as the boy went down. They were all yelling and Sebastian fired again, this time shooting Aline.

"Shut. Up." He snarled and they did, Luke held Aline putting pressure on her wound while Jace did the same to Jordan.

Jon was the only one who didn't move. Everyone fell quiet and Clary gagged at the sight of blood. "No one talks and no one will die. Jordan, I'm sorry about that, truly. It's just, I'm not your man and Aline, baby, no hard feelings. I just needed everyone to know I'm serious about this shit." Sebastian sighed and started to pace, he cast glances at Jonathan.

"Brother." Sebastian greeted and the oldest Morgenstern stared at his twin with the gun.

"You aren't getting out of here alive. I will kill you or Clary will, or the police, point is, you're a walking dead man, Sebastian." Jonathan said, his voice even and calm.

"Funny, Jonathan. Five minutes ago I was a dead man to you. Ironic how shit works out, isn't it?" Sebastian asked.

"Call mother, get her down here, right the fuck now." Sebastian snarled at Jon and he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. There was a bang on the door and Sebastian rolled his eyes.

"What's going on in there?" The principal yelled.

"Well, sir, I'm holding a lot of people hostage. Two of them have gut shot wounds to their stomach and I'm waiting for my mother, what's going on with you?" Sebastian leaned against the wall, casually while Jon spoke rapidly into the phone, trying to calm and convince at the same time.

Finally Sebastian just grabbed the phone, "Mom, how are things? You're going to come down here, to the school, or I'm going to shoot my way out. I have two guns, fully loaded. Tell me how high you think the body count will get before I'm stopped? I found you, mom. You've been running from a ghost for five years and look at that, he caught up with you. Took a while for you to take the bait with this museum job, but what can I say? I'm good." Sebastian hung up the phone and threw it against the wall.

"That's fucking mature." Jon muttered.

"Clary, you fuck Jace yet?" Sebastian asked and Clary stared with wide, stunned eyes. Sebastian rose the gun and pointed it at Jace.

"No, he didn't. We haven't! Don't, Seb." Clary nearly yelled. Sebastian looked back at her and cocked his head to the side.

"Well, you like him." Sebastian says with a roll of his eyes.

"No I don't, he's nothing." Clary says and Jon shut his eyes. He knew what they needed to do to stop this. He needed to be indifferent to everyone in this room. Clary needed to not care about anyone or at least convince Sebastian that she doesn't.

"He's nothing?" Sebastian asked, keeping his gun pointed at Jace and Clary shook her head.

"Yes, he's nothing. They're all nothing, you're wasting your time." Clary sighed and Jon suddenly found it interesting that she was talking. Then again it made sense. Clary always figured her body was only capable of running, but Jon knew otherwise. When it came down to it, Clary would fight to the death for the ones she loved and she'd use every weapon to do so. Even if it meant using her voice.

* * *

 **Author's Note: God, Sebastian you sneaking son of a fuck. I felt particularly evil writing this chapter, but trust, this is needed to put things into motion. Clary is not cured, in any way, this shit just needs her voice to go down. Anyway, hope you enjoyed nonetheless.**

 **Please review! I need them like air :)**

 **I OWN NOTHING! Okay, bye guys!**


	8. Chapter 8

Clary sat next to Aline. Her skin was pale and covered in a fresh sheen of sweat. This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening. Shit like this stopped years ago. Clary thought she was free. Oh, how wrong she was. Jon wasn't sitting, he was leaning against the wall watching Sebastian pace back and forth, gun in one hand and a phone he was currently typing on in the other.

"Seb." Clary whispered and his eyes snapped up. Her skin crawled under his gaze.

"I have to pee." She says softly and he frowns, glancing around the locker room.

"The bathrooms are connected to the back door." Clary confirmed and he scowled.

"I'll be real quick." She says, widening her eyes, giving off that submissive look. Sebastian clenched his jaw in annoyance.

"Hold it." He said to her and Jon frowned at her in confusion.

"Please, Seb?" Clary asked and Sebastian inhaled.

"I'm not going to leave Jon alone, and I'm not going to leave . . . You." Clary cleared her throat. She met Sebastian's eyes.

"Three minutes, Clary." Sebastian said and she stood moving toward the back door, she slid through and it shut. She wanted to melt into the dark. The safety of being alone. Tears filled her eyes and she let them fall before quickly wiping them. Remembering what she came in here for, she reached behind her and into the waistband of her jeans pulling out her cellphone. She turned off the ringer and opened it.

Her: _My name is Clary Morgenstern and I am one of the people being held captive inside Idris High School's locker room. The man who is keeping us hostage is very dangerous and armed. Two guns, as far as I know. Two people shot. None dead, but they aren't going to make it much longer. He wants one thing and that's me. He won't hurt me, but he will kill anyone else without hesitation or remorse._

Clary bit her bottom lip and pressed send, that message cost her twenty seconds. She has two and a half left. She waited, silently praying this was going to work. Just as sweat started to form on the back of her neck, they responded.

911: _Hello Clary, my name is Detective Penhallow. What is the man's name? How many hostages? How since the two victims were shot?_

Her: _Sebastian Morgenstern. 14 hostages. About ten minutes._

911: _Keep calm, Clary. We are all here to help._

A knock at the door startled Clary and she very nearly dropped her phone. "Clary, get out here, or I'm going to start shooting again." Sebastian's voice called and Clary turned off her phone and placed it back in the waistband of her jeans. She opened the door and Seb immediately wrapped a hand around her bicep. She cried out in pain at the touch of another, this situation getting to her.

"No!" She screamed at him and he stared at her calmly. The locker room was deadly silent, as if some forgot to breathe. Clary stared up at him, stumbling backwards and falling on her backside. Sebastian squatted in front of her cocking his head to the side.

"Clary." His voice was so calm, so casual that the surge of emotion that slammed into her caused her to sob uncontrollably.

"I haven't done anything to you. Not in the last thirteen minutes that we've been in here. Have an outburst like that again and I will shove my gun so far up Isabelle's cunt that when I do pull the trigger, she'll spit the bullet out. Do you understand me?" His voice didn't raise an octave above normal conversation. It wasn't a threat. It was a fact.

Clary didn't say anything; she couldn't. A numbness was sliding along her skin, soaking into her cells, and cutting off her senses. Sight, touch, taste, sound, and smell left her like they had never even existed. She was a person trapped inside despair. Her demons gaining control, as easy as if she'd just handed over the reins. There was no more pain. There was no more Sebastian. There was no more Clary.

•••

Jonathon frowned at the area his brother disappeared in. He moved closer to the exit, but by the time he got within reaching distance. Sebastian reappeared and threw Clary to the ground. The door, escape, all of it, was immediately forgotten. Jon lunged toward his sister, spinning her around. No gunshots.

He checked her pulse. It was beating just fine. Her wide, deep green eyes were open, staring at the ceiling, but not actually seeing. They were distant, empty. Jon looked up at the Sebastian. He did not look happy.

"What did you do?" Jon whispered and Sebastian shrugged.

"Nothing." Seb said and then made a contemplative face.

"I _may_ have said something along the lines of shoving a gun up Isabelle's cunt and the bullet coming out of her mouth, something like that. I don't really remember nor do I _care_." He drawled and Jon felt a surge of white hot fury run through his veins. He was going to kill his brother. It was no longer a dream or a threat. He thought it with such contempt that it became nothing more than a mere fact. Sebastian Morgenstern would die at the hands of Jonathon Morgenstern. Just as the sky is blue.

"So, uh, what's wrong with her?" Sebastian asked and Jonathon squinted at his little brother.

"You – you _moron_." Jon said, disbelief marring his features. Seb blinked.

"You spent her entire life, basically. Raping her. Abusing her. _Dehumanizing_ her. What did you think the outcome of that would be, dumbass? What? That she didn't have a breaking point? Everyone has a breaking point, Sebastian. You _idiot_." Jon spat. The fury overcoming him.

"Great, Jon. Wonderful. But she's done this before, duh. Why do you think Hodge beat the fuck out of you that first time, fucker? For motherfucking kicks? No, he didn't get off on that shit. So, wake her up, get her out of this – thing that she's in or I'm going to put a bullet in the head of that sweet little brunette over there. Then I'm going to beat the shit out of that fag over there, I haven't decided which one yet, but I'll do it and then I'll put a bullet in your motherfucking ass until she decides to wake THE FUCK UP!" Sebastian roared, his foot colliding with Clary's side. Jon maneuvered her away quickly and rose, his fist colliding with Sebastian's jaw.

Sebastian barely hit the floor before he twisted his body and pulled the trigger. The bullet rebounded in Jon's ears. A soft ring as his brain fought to catch up with what just happened. He looked up and a pair of brilliant blue eyes, dead eyes, stared up at him. Blaming him. The bullet in her forehead signaling her death. Kaelie. Jon stared numbly at the girl lying dead on the floor. Thirteen to go.

Emma was crying against Julian, holding her breath to keep the sobs at bay. Sebastian stood and turned his head, spitting blood to the side. "Fucker, that's on you." Seb said and a tear rolled down Jon's cheek, because yeah, that was on him.

"Now." Seb clasped the back of Jon's neck with his hand.

"Wake are baby sister up, or I _will_ shoot Isabelle, and not only that, but I'll rape her while you watch. I don't think you'd like that, big brother. Right?" He asked, carefree eyes staring into Jon's despaired.

Sebastian didn't care. He couldn't care. He had no conscience. No soul. This was a game to him. He was a demon in human form.

"Alright, kids. You stay here and I'm going to go make a phone call. Any of you move and I rape every girl in here. I will bust their backdoors without caution. Just ask Clare . . . oh wait, that's why we're in this shit, never mind. _Behave_." Seb sang and walked out of sight.

Jon moved and grabbed the collar of Clary's shirt, "Wake the fuck up." He says, shaking her.

"Dammit." He snarls, standing up and facing the group.

"Coach." Jon said and Luke looked up.

"Aline?" Jon asked.

"She's gone." Luke said, shaking his head and Jon turned, punching a locker. It dented. Jace inhaled deeply and stood moving over to Jordan.

"Hey man, you still there?" He asked and Jordan made a noise.

"I need you not to breathe too heavily, when you do the blood rushes to your heart quicker, causing more blood to flow. What I need you to do is take small, calming breaths, they hurt like fuck, but you got a pretty girl crying over here for you, squeeze my hand if you got me." Jace murmured and held Jordan's limp hand. Ever so slightly, there was pressure and Jace gently patted his shoulder.

"Good man." He moved away from Jordan. Jon moved to stand in front of Jace.

"Have you and Clary ever had sex?" He asked and Jace shook his head.

"You ever kiss her?" He asked and Jace shook his head again.

"No Jon, she doesn't like to be touched. We're just friends." Jace hissed and Jon scoffed.

"Sure, great. Anyway, I like Izzy and my brother being a dumbass, mind-reading freak he is, knows this. He also knows that Alec and Magnus are gay, he doesn't like that. He will use it to his advantage." Jon met everyone's eyes.

"He will know your secrets before you do. You keep your eyes and head down, you talk when spoken to and if he says anything, even if you don't like it, you agree. He wants you to take your shirt of, you do it. He asks you to jump, you say how high. He likes control. He gets off on it. Give it to him and you won't die." Jon said.

"Our clothes?" Emma whispers and Jon met her gaze briefly.

"What happens in the locker room, stays in the locker room. Been through shit, believe me, rather go through that again than die. You with me?" He asked her and she nodded quickly.

"Jon?" Julian asked as Jon moved Clary to lie in the bench. Izzy crawled over and cradled her face between her hands. Murmuring something Jon couldn't make out.

"Yeah?" Jon asked.

"Truth. My brother dead?" Julian asked and Jon shut his eyes tightly.

"Yeah, Julian. Your brother's gone." Jon knew that if all Sebastian wanted was Ian's identity, he would have killed the kid without a moment's hesitation. Jon moved and lifted Aline up and placed her on one of the gurneys in the medical part of the locker room. He covered her with a sheet before doing the exact same thing with Kaelie. He sighed and glanced at both girls.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so, so sorry." He whispers. He walks back out and sees that Clary is still staring into nothingness. She was locked down. Drowning in her shock. Drowning in her demons. He needed to wake her up. Jon moved over to Clary and knelt, placing his hands on either side of her, he lowered his head so that his lips were at her ear.

"You left Clare. I need you to come back. Once upon a time, you told me that you wanted to do this. Close in on yourself. That you wanted it more than you wanted breath. I cried and told you that would kill me. You shook your head and asked me to wait while you explained. Now I'm going to remind you of what you said."

 _"_ _They took my virginity. They took my innocence. They took my naivety. They took my freedom. They destroyed my childhood. They will not get that, Jon. They will not get my surrender or my soul. My voice was bad enough. . . . I want it, though. I want to leave and explore the bliss of feeling numb, but I won't. I can't. Because if I do, I will admit true defeat. And the one thing they will never get. Is my destruction. I may want to run. But I will fight to keep the ability of flight."_

Jon whispered the words softly into her ear so that only she could hear. He said it once and then he said it twice and that's when Sebastian reappeared. He lifted his gaze. Clary's eyes were shut. "Please." He whispered.

"It's still not working, jeez." Seb muttered and Jonathon stood, turning to him.

"Perhaps if you weren't a seriously deranged psychopath. This wouldn't be happening. Then again, if you didn't rape her and do all of the things you did, you wouldn't exist. Because that's all you can do, isn't Sebastian? Dad was right, you are a worthless piece of shit." Jon spat and Sebastian stared at him for a nanosecond and then in a flash, he tossed the gun to the side and barreled into Jonathon.

Both brothers roared as their bodies collided with the floor. Punches were thrown and kicks. Hands and feet colliding with flesh with disturbing amounts of strength.

Jon flipped their positions and delivered four powerful blows to his younger brother's jaw. Sebastian swiped Jon's leg from under him and slammed his older brother to the ground with a loud _smack!_

"Fucking pervert." Jonathon growled, butting heads with his nose and Sebastian roared.

"Stupid little bitch!" Sebastian screamed, clutching to his nose as he sat on his knees. Both boys shared a look and just as Jon was about to lunge with him, a bat flew from the side and collided with the back of Sebastian's head. The sound of crunching bone that exploded into Jon's range of hearing sent a shudder of disgust through his body.

Sebastian fell forward, still. The bat fell and a squeak hit his ears. He looked up to see Clary wincing down at her weapon of choice. Fitting. Jon stood and stared at her. She met him with glossy eyes and they both looked down at their brother. "Did – did I k-kill him?" Clary sputtered. Jon rolled his head and winced at the sudden pain. He shook it off and straightened his spine before walking over to where the gun lay in a corner, by the door.

He lifted it up and walked calmly back over to Sebastian. He raised it and without hesitation fired a bullet into the back of his head. Clary gasped, and spun away from the sight, burying her face in Jon's shoulder. "One of us did. We'll never know who." Jon whispered against her temple, before tossing the gun to the side and wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling her back toward the group, currently piled by Jordan.

"It's over, let's get him out of here." Jon said and moved to the door, he opened it and no one was there.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." Jace mumbled and Jon turned his attention to Clary.

"You alive?" he asked and she flushed, embarrassment and shame over coming her eyes.

"Yes, I'm alive." Clary choked. Jon nodded and turned.

"Jace help me with him." The blonde didn't hesitate and everyone helped Jordan up. Maia was choking on her tears, anew with hope. Jon and Jace carried Jordan's nearly lifeless body through the halls and Clary looked back to see that Luke hadn't followed. She looked back to see the group all hustling out, Izzy appeared at her side.

"God, Clary." She breathed. Clary could only nod. Both girls rushed back to the locker room and moved to medical. Luke sat, tears on his cheeks. Two covered bodies lay and Clary sobbed.

"Oh." She whimpered, moving. Aline. Kaelie.

"I couldn't leave them." Luke explained and Izzy nodded.

"Kaelie was a bitch, but she didn't deserve this. At all. She was a good person." Izzy whispered.

"Aline too. This is sickening." Izzy held her stomach and Clary shut her eyes tightly. She could only agree. This was sickening. It was wrong. But . . . it was _over_. Finally, over. For Clary at least and Jon.

A loud buzzing drew Clary's attention and she walked into Luke's office while Izzy stayed with the coach. A phone buzzed and spun on the wooden desk. She lifted it up and read the text.

Unknown: _You good? Call me._

Sebastian wasn't alone. This wasn't one of his games. This was his plan. He'd _planned_ this with some ulterior motive, other that just getting back at his siblings. Maybe this wasn't over. Maybe this was just the beginning.

* * *

 **Author's Note. *sigh***

 **Bye, bye, little brother. So, Sebastian isn't the big bad. I wonder who is? (Evil Laugh)**

 **What did you guys think of that? I kind of realized about halfway through that Jace isn't really a big character, yet. He will be. Jon, this is like character building. He won't be the main superhero or whatever. I just felt that this was a feud between brothers and siblings and Jace is not in this family. It just felt fitting, like Jon getting the last hurrah! Anyway, just wanted to cover _that_ up :)**

 **Feedback for chapters, this is a wonderful bartering economy we have here!**

 **Love you all. Bye!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note: Okay, last chapter of the day! Yay! I love all who have reviewed. You guys are fucking awesome, no joke.**

 **We have some major Clace in this chapter and I hope you understand that I'm just trying to build their relationship completely.**

 **Clary is talking. Not much, but she is and I'll explain that later, just go with me on that. I'm a firm believer that if you believe in yourself then you can do anything, no matter what. So, this is Clary believing in herself and her strength. *Baby steps***

 **You know the drill, reviews breed chapters!**

 **Happy Reading :)**

* * *

Clary stared at herself in the mirror. Her dress had a halter top before flaring out at the waist to mid-thigh. Completely black and form fitting. Her arms and back were bare, before she pulled on a black sweater. Today was the memorial for Aline and Kaelie. Along with Ian. They found his body buried on the outskirts of town. Not even a mile away. Bile rose for the billionth time in Clary's throat and she swallowed it back for the billionth time.

Clary left her hair down for this, she had cut it. Instead of falling to her waist like it always had, it now fell to her breasts and was styled in loose silky waves. She looked pretty. She supposed. She didn't look hideous or dirty like she had always thought long hair had made her, she liked it.

She left her room with her small purse that only held her phone, some cash, and the phone she found in Luke's office that awful night. She didn't give it over to the police. She figured that this would one day come back to bite her in the ass, but if she gave it over to the police, they would track it and find nothing. The lead would run cold and she would live in fear. Keeping this phone gave her an advantage and it gave her hope. She wasn't done with her revenge. And the last text on it was the only evidence she needed.

Unknown: _Hello, Clary._

Someone was watching her and she was damn determined to find out who the fuck it was. Jonathan was downstairs, clad in a pair of black dress pants, a navy blue button up, and a crisp black suit jacket. He looked calm, she could see the uneasiness in his eyes, though. Her mother appeared and she didn't even try to smile.

"Alright, honeys, let's go." She said and they leave. The drive was quiet and tense, Clary didn't think she would make it to the memorial without throwing up, so when she did, she was stunned. Jon walked next to her while her mother made a beeline for Maryse. The two women immediately started in a soft converse. Clary frowned. She hadn't spoken to Jace, Alec, or Magnus since that night and that night was nearly eight days ago.

She and Izzy texted constantly. Izzy wanted to talk, _really_ talk and Clary was up for that. She hoped. What she wasn't up for was seeing Jace again and the suit he wore wasn't helping any. Molding to him like clay. She frowned, his hair was pulled back away from his face and tied to the nape of his neck. His aristocratic, nearly brutal facial features on full display. His gaze met hers and the connection was brief, both looking away quickly.

Clary shifted her wait and squeezed Jon's wrist comfortingly before walking toward Jace. He stared straight ahead, at nothing and her chest squeezed. She stood next to him and turned her head to look up at him. The tip of her head barely reached his neck.

Both of them were quiet as they stood, blank faces of grieving students, parents, teachers, and citizens of Alicante walking around them. Blurring as they both stood still, standing tall. Procrastinating the inevitable. Clary looked away and took a deep breath of the fresh morning air.

Her eyes danced down and noticed that the hand closest to her was out of his pocket, while the other rested comfortably in his pants. Clary bit her bottom lip, before looking straight ahead again. Slowly, very slowly, she opened her hand and brushed her pinky along his. Both of them jerked, but neither moved or said anything.

Clary blinked at the ground as she continued to move her hand carefully along his. Everywhere her skin touched seemed to burst into flames. Not the bad kind, but the tingles of curiosity. _Don't hate me. Don't blame me._ She begged silently.

She slid her fingers through his and he inhaled audibly, flexing his hand so that she could slide her fingers through. Once they were clasped, both squeezed. His hand engulfed hers completely, but their fingers just _fit_. Like two pieces of the same broken puzzle.

Clary turned her head, and buried it in his shoulder. "Forgive me." She whispers and she felt as his body tensed. He released her hand and raised both hands to cup her face, forcing her to tilt her head back.

"Nothing to forgive, beautiful. You didn't do anything." He says, those golden eyes boring into hers. Sadness. Sincerity. And another emotion she wasn't ready to decipher at the moment.

"I can talk." She whispers. _Barely_. She added in her mind and a smile lifted his lips. He winked.

"Yes and what a sexy voice you have." He joked and she laughed with a slight sobbing hint before launching herself at him. His arm wrapped around her back and he lifted her up as she buried her face in his neck. His fresh sunshine scent enveloping her. She still didn't like physical contact, but right now, she wanted it with Jace. For a moment. After ten seconds. She pushed away and he released her instantly, making her heart clench in realization.

 _This beautiful, dangerous man will never, ever hurt me._ She realized and it made her heart sing.

"We can still text, though, right?" Jace asked and Clary smiled and pulled out her phone.

Her: _Yes, handsome._

He read the text with a smile and bent down, kissing the spot just below her ear. Causing a tingle to envelope her entire body. Uh oh. Losing control, damn it. She chose not to care . . . for a second, anyway.

"You're the first person to make me smile in a week. You're the first girl to make me smile in a _really_ long time." He whispered quietly and she shut her eyes to the fluttering in her chest.

"Anytime." She whispered against his cheek. _This talking thing was going to take some time. Deep breaths._ She thought to herself. Then she typed on her phone, basking in the easiness of not having to work her vocal cords.

Her: _Memorial, now?_

Her eyes turned soft as he read the text. He placed his phone back in his jacket pocket and she put hers back in her purse. He placed a careful, hesitant hand on the small of her back. She was okay with it.

"Yes, beautiful. Memorial, now."

•••

Clary sat next to Jace through the entire ceremony, their legs brushed and she was hyper aware of everything. The breathing of the people around her and even the wind blowing through the trees.

The despair of hearing these kids talk about the death of their friends put her into a deep depression. One where she felt as if her chest would explode and her stomach would fall onto the ground. She started to fidget when someone said how even though Kaelie didn't like to show her emotions, she felt them, deeply. Her phone buzzed and she glanced at it, tears filling her eyes and blurring the screen slightly.

Jace: _Beautiful._

A calm washed over her and she breathed out her first deep breath. Self-hatred still warred, but she was calm. Jace was making her calm. The thought brought more tears to her eyes. Oh yes, she liked this boy. She liked him too much. She wiped a tear with the back of her hand.

After the memorial, Jace gripped Clary's hip and placed his lips by her ear. "Taki's?" He asked softly and she nodded, quickly. She wanted to give her respects, but she didn't feel like she had the right. At all. It was her fault.

"Jace." Clary whimpered when they got to the parking lot. Her body was shaking and soft sobs were shuddering from her body.

"It's my fault. That they're dead. If maybe, I would have – I don't know. Gone with him. Perhaps, they would still be alive and I feel bad." Clary cried, losing feeling in her legs. Jace caught her when she nearly dropped to the ground.

"Fuck, Clary, do you know how fucked up that stupid bastard of a brother was? He was fucking fucked up. He was sick. Clary nothing that happened was your fault. Not in anyway. You – you've been through shit. I have an idea and I also think that maybe I don't really know anything at all. I don't want to, until you want me to and if you never want me to, that's fine. But Clary, I know some of the fucked up shit and I have a large enough imagination. Look at me." He whispers, gripping her jaw and forcing her gaze to his.

Two tears fell down her cheeks and he caught them with his thumbs. "You were abused." He whispered and she nodded, shaking tremendously.

"You want to tell me about it?" He asked softly and Clary's breath hitched. Did she?

"No." She whispered and he nodded.

"Okay, there. Perfect. You say no. I stop. That's how shit works. That's how I work, you get me with that? In _every_ aspect, Clary. That's how it works. Anything and everything, no means no. Get me?" He asked and Clary stared at him, before nodding slowly.

"Got you." She whispered and he smiled, before letting her go. He went to grab her hand, but she wrapped her arms around her middle and glanced at him. She typed something quickly on her phone.

Her: _Friends?_

He winked. "Always."

•••

Clary bounced in the booth at Taki's and Jace watched her in amusement. "What do you want?" He asked, watching her in amusement. His phone buzzed. He smirked.

Her: _Cheesy fries with ranch._

He looked up at her and she smiled big. He nodded. "Loaded cheesy fries with ranch." He contemplates and she nods, bouncing and leaning forward, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously and he chuckles. The waitress appears and Jace orders for them. The girl disappears.

Clary lays her forehead on the table and starts typing on the phone.

Her: _What's your favorite memory with Magnus?_

She looks up at him with her chin rested on the table. He stares down at her and then shrugs.

"Uh, my tenth birthday. I don't really . . . like my birthday and I don't like celebrating it. Anyway, I would get really pissed when fosters would try to celebrate it, you know, for the image sake. And I can remember getting us actually kicked out of the foster home we were in on my tenth birthday. It was our seventh foster home in five years. I figured he'd be pissed and you know, not want to go into the system with me anymore. It didn't work out that way and he gave me this card." Jace cleared his throat.

"And it was really emotional. I actually cried and I don't cry, at all. That was the moment I realized that he was my brother and it was also the moment I realized I wasn't alone. Definitely bittersweet." He smiled and she stared at him. Clary leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"You're really sweet. Very hard, yet very emotional. It's . . . beautiful." She winked and he chuckled.

"Whatever you say, red." He said and she leaned back, staring at him.

"What's your favorite memory of you and Jon?" He asked and she stared at him.

"It was the first day we got out. After two years. He made me chocolate chip cookies and he got me away from all of the cameras and the cops. I realized that he would always protect me." She whispered, looking away.

"Two years." Jace murmured and Clary smiled sarcastically.

'Another time.' She mouthed and looked down at her hands. The cheesy fries were set down and Clary smiled before digging in with Jace.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note: Helloooooo! Okay, full chapter. Packed with serious shit, so enjoy, lovelies.**

 **Thank you to my wonderful reviewers, you guys are fucking awesome!**

 **Chapters for reviews, same old same old :)**

 **Happy Reading . . .**

* * *

Clary and Jace stood in front of Idris High. Both staring up at the large sign spelling the name of the school out in large steel block letters. "You nervous?" Jace asked.

"No. You?" Clary asked softly, her voice slightly wavering.

"Absolutely." He said and she laughed, nodding.

"Me too." She whispered and Jace glanced down at her.

"Your vocal cords good?" He asked and she winced, before shrugging and shaking her head in the negative. His hand rested gently on the small of her back and she edged closer, putting more pressure against his hand and he pushed back. The tips of his fingers digging into her skin, reminding her that he was real. Reminding her that she was real and they were really doing this.

"Where's Jon?" Jace asked and Clary grabbed her phone, typing a response. She's gotten good at small answers with her voice, but she can't do it around anyone new, apart from Jace and Izzy. So she texted when the answer was long.

Her: _All I know is that I woke up and walked past his closed door. It's usually open in the morning, but not today. There was a bunch of moaning and groaning. Of the feminine and male variety, so I hauled ass. Call him. I'm sure you'll get quite the answer ;)_

He read the message and then threw his head back and laughed. Jace finished with a snicker and wiped his hand over his mouth as if trying to wipe away the humor. Suffice to say, it didn't work. Clary was all grins though, no hiding, she _adored_ his laugh. It was rich and husky, the type of sound you wanted to make someone make a thousand times a day for your entire life. Yes. It was that good.

"Okay, poor little red. Not a happy morning for you, huh?" He asked and she turned, so that she walked in front of him. They both moved swiftly, Jace not pausing his step as her arms wrapped around his neck and one of his arms wrapped around her waist, the other hand grabbing her thigh. Hoisting her up so that she settled around his waist.

"Who says it wasn't a happy morning for Clary?" She whispered, swiftly in his ear and his lips twitched as he glanced over at her.

"Was it?" He asked, cocking an eyebrow and she shrugged, looking down the hall. She noticed Izzy. The brunette looked flustered and that was so unlike Izzy that Clary briefly wondered if she missed the memo of hell freezing over. Clary jumped down and moved swiftly toward her friend.

She wrapped her hands around Izzy's wrists as soon as she was in the right distance. "What's wrong?" Clary asked and Izzy met her gaze. The fear and anxiety that shone hurt Clary, physically. It was as if Clary was gazing into a mirror. Isabelle was terrified.

"I can't get the images out of my head. I see him with that gun and I see Aline and Jordan going down. Maia screaming. Kaelie dying. You going into a catatonic state. I see Jon and him fighting and Jon pulling the trigger. Oh god, Clary. I had a _dream_ about that. Except it wasn't _him_ who got shot, it was Jon." Isabelle was in full blown sobs by the time she was done and she was gaining a lot of attention. Attention she didn't seem to notice.

"And his words! They were cruel and disgusting!" Isabelle's weight was suddenly all on Clary as she lost feeling in her legs. Clary briefly wondered if this was how she reacted her first day out. She didn't have much memory from those early days, but she could remember tears, screaming, and lots of need for pain.

You know that sobbing? The cries that aren't exactly sobs, but tiny screams. With the tears soaking the face and streaming down the neck? The snot and the horrified expression etched onto a person's face? That's Izzy at the moment. Jace held her from behind while Clary worked on keeping her up straight in the front. A few teachers had formed a circle around them.

"Okay this is bullshit." Jace cursed, before he moved swiftly, lifting Izzy as if she were a small child into his arms and carrying her swiftly down the hall. He pushed her head into his neck and she clutched to him while Clary followed quickly, nearly jogging to keep up with Jace's fast strides.

"Move." Jace said and kids lunged out of the way. Clary's jogging turned into a full blown sprint as Jace picked up his pace. He got to the truck and Clary barely had her door closed before he was squealing out of the parking lot. A hysterical Izzy in the back seat. Clary started to type ferociously on her phone.

"Not now, beautiful." Jace growled, making a sharp turned and Clary threw her phone. She opened her mouth, needing to say something, but her throat dried and closed up. Anxiety of the repercussions that came with talking clawing at her stomach. _Damn you, Lewis._ She thought in bitterness. It was his fault. His and Herondale's. It was all of their faults.

•••

Izzy sat in Clary's living room, sobbing to Jocelyn incoherently, but the older redhead listened, holding Izzy's hand in patience. Jace grabbed Clary's fingers and pulled her out of the room. "Hey, green, I'm sorry. What did you want to tell me earlier?" He whispers softly, running the tips of his fingers down the side of her cheek and she bit her bottom lip, staring up at him. Oh Jesus. He was very dangerous.

She reached into his front pocket and swiftly grabbed his phone, pulling up notes.

Her: _Izzy's still in shock. It wouldn't surprise me if she even gained some type of PTSD from the situation. In fact, you should probably look into that as well. Anyway, when she's freaking out like that and you go into big bro mode, it's toxic and can end very badly. Our instincts react to others. It's carnal and internal, and so small of a change that sometimes we don't even know it, but if she's freaking out and she feels your own unease, it could send her into a full blown attack. Those are particularly dangerous._

After Jace read the message, he stared at Clary for a very long time. "Clary, I already have PTSD. I don't need another diagnosis and as for the other thing, you're right. I need to keep calm. It's impossible when someone I love is hurting, though." He says gently, his lips barely brushing her cheek. She turned her head and gripped the collar of his cheek.

"PTSD?" She asked him, her voice still just a whisper. He watched her carefully and nodded.

"Yeah, I got shit in my past too." He says, his voice equally as soft. They were centimeters apart and Clary ached with the distance. For once in her life, she wanted a man near her. Touching her. Maybe even kissing her. She's never done that. They took everything else, but that.

At that little reminder, Clary turned her head, effectively breaking the moment as she stepped back. Jace cleared his throat and straightened.

"Why aren't you freaking out, like Izzy?" Jace asked. Wasn't that the billion dollar question? Clary didn't have an answer, so she just shrugged. She'd been asking herself that question for the past two weeks. Why wasn't she freaking? Why wasn't she hauled up somewhere drooling and rocking back and forth in a corner? Why was she so damn calm? Shock. She didn't honestly think that was it, but that's what she was going with.

"Stay the night." Clary blurted out in a soft huff. Her eyes widened and she stared up at him. He blinked.

"It's only seven-thirty in the morning." He murmured and she swallowed, embarrassment enveloping her in its cocoon.

"Right." She breathed, nodding. She turned to make a hasty get away.

"Fuck it."

His soft curse took her off guard and she was just about to turn to ask him what was wrong, but he took the initiative to grip her bicep and spin her around at an extraordinary pace, before lowering his head and capturing her lips with his. She gasped against the unfamiliar contact of another's lips against hers. The motion only caused him to slide deeper against her.

She was aware that one was supposed to close their eyes during kissing. She wasn't an idiot. She hoped. Anyway, her eyes just wouldn't close. They were wide, watching as he tilted his head, while she felt his tongue slide along hers. That's when her eyes closed and it wasn't a fast snapping close. It was a slow flutter, like falling asleep, except this bliss was _so_ much better. Her heart hammered in her chest and her head pounded as she kissed him back. She got the hang of it fairly quickly, still allowing him to lead and when it was over, she resented the distance between them.

Clary pressed her fingers to her now swollen and puffy lips. "Wow." She whispered and he chuckled.

"Thank you." He said and she narrowed her eyes at him, but his grin didn't fade for a second. At all.

"Fuck you." She whispered and he laughed completely.

"You two are disgusting." Both of their attention snapped to the top of the steps, where Jon stood, looking scarred for fucking life. He wore only a pair of sweats and they hung low, dangerously low on his lean hips. Broad shoulders, massive chest, and lean cut torso on full display. Clary became unamused quickly.

"Sex." That was the only word she could get out. Jon frowned at her.

"If I had walked in on _that_ , he would no longer be breathing." Jon said sweetly, walking down the steps with his hands placed comfortably in the pockets of his pants.

"I think I can hold my own, thanks." Jace clipped, irritably.

"No. You. Morning. Sex." Clary said and Jon examined her.

"I didn't take you for a voyeur, Clare." Jon said, conversationally. Clary pushed forward, punching him in the abdomen. He didn't even flinch. Her lips parted and she squeaked in pain, jumping up and down and waving her wrist around as if the thing was on fire.

"I wasn't. You were damn loud." She hissed and he chuckled.

"My bad. Everything okay? What are you guys doing home?" Jon asked and Jace huffed.

"Izzy went into a full blown panic frenzy. Meltdown in the hallway. We brought her here." Jace said, but he could barely get the last part out before Jon was bulldozing past him and into the living room.

"Don't you find it interesting how he can be in bed with someone one moment and then completely and utterly encased in someone else the next?" Jace asked, rubbing his jaw absentmindedly and Clary shrugged.

"Everyday."

They glanced at each other, before both broke into giant grins.

•••

Clary lay awake that night, staring into the darkness. Jace was breathing quietly on the floor next to her. It brought a silly grin to her face that she didn't bother even trying to stop. He stayed. Her heart warmed. This was still dangerous, but she stopped caring the moment she asked him to forgive her. She turned onto her side, truly considering, waking him up, by falling on top of him.

She rolled her eyes and when she closed them. A bleep signaled her alert. She frowned at her silent phone on the dresser right next to her. The beep again. And her body went completely rigid. She opened the bottom drawer and lifted the black phone she got from Luke's office. Sebastian's phone. The number on the screen read Unknown. She answered and hesitantly brought it to her ear.

"Clarissa." She didn't correct the older man's voice in her ear. She recognized it immediately. It was rather hard to forget that voice. Stephen Herondale. Tears filled her eyes and she inhaled silently, before silently leaving her bed and going into her bathroom.

"Stephen." Clary greeted and the older man chuckled.

"It's been a while." He commented.

"Five years." Clary agreed and both were silent.

"I hear you're enjoying Alicante. That's wonderful, Clary. I'm so happy for you." The man said and Clary's eyes narrowed into disgusted slits.

"What do you want?" She snarled and he right out laughed, it lasted for so long that Clary contemplated just hanging up. When he finally calmed, he cleared his throat and Clary could nearly picture the psychopath wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.

"Oh, Clary, you crack me up. I want many things, love. I want money. Fame. Power. You . . ." he trailed off and Clary scowled.

"Well, you can go fuck yourself because I will die before I _ever_ find myself in a situation that involves you again. This is my mother's shit and last I checked, a two year sentence was more than enough payment." Clary growled and there was silence on the other end.

"Clary, darling. I'm calling to help. That's all. I merely have a need to converse with you. Please allow me to. The information I possess may be of use to you." Stephen says casually and Clary's eyes narrow suspiciously.

"What is it?" She snapped.

"Remember when I informed you who your true biological father really is?" He asked and her skin crawled, she swallowed back the bile.

"Yes." She answered honestly and he hummed carefully in her ear.

"And who is that, dear?" Stephen asked and Clary was silent for a very long time before answering. It could have been days for all she knew. She took a deep breath and answered calmly.

"You."

"Correct, me. Jocelyn, the little whore, stepped out with her husband's best friend. After he stepped out with hers. Remember when I also told you that Jocelyn did have another child?" Stephen asked and Clary frowned.

"You're speaking as if I have the ability to lose any memory of you, Stephen." Clary murmurs and he chuckled.

"Correct. What if I told you, that other child was closer than you think?" He asked and she snorted.

"Like where? Your prize, Sebastian is dead. Who else is there?" Clary snapped.

"Valentine and Celine's child. A boy. He was given up for adoption. I'm told he grew up strong, broad, and well. Possessing the characteristic perfection of the Morgenstern beauty. Sound familiar?"

A single tear fell down Clary's cheek, she shook her head, not wanting to believe it.

"You're lying." She growled.

"In all honesty, I wish I were, love. This shit just gets more and more coincidental as the story unfolds. You are the daughter of Jocelyn Fairchild and Stephen Herondale. And that man currently lying in your bedroom is the son of Valentine Morgenstern and Celine Herondale. Scandalous.'

"Anyway, I figured you should know, because Lewis is mighty interested in the Morgenstern bloodline and when he realizes that there is a child of Morgenstern blood and it is not you or Jonathon, what exactly do you think he's going to do? Let that opportunity pass? Oh please. Darling the man is insane. And obsessed, that is a deadly combination.'

"And when he realizes that there is a Morgenstern who is unaware of just how crazy he is, he's going to implant himself so deeply into Jace's life and seduce him onto the other side. Jace doesn't possess the betrayal you and Jonathon do. He's fair game. He's the motherfucking secret weapon." The line clicked off and Clary's heart sunk to the floor.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: Okaaaay . . . . so, I guess I really didn't clear things up last chapter like I thought, so I'll do it now. Clary and Jace are** ** _not_** **related. I would never, ever do that, like at all. I absolutely** ** _hated_** **it in the books, and I wouldn't even know where to begin to explain that away in this story. For now, Clary is the child of Stephen Herondale and Jocelyn. Jace is the child of Valentine and Celine. Two different set of parents. No relation. The only weird thing about it is the fact that they both share Jonathon as a sibling. So they're both half-siblings to Jonathon. That's it, they aren't related to** ** _each other_** **.**

 **Okay, whew! Glad we got that settled.**

 **I hope everyone is enjoying this story so far and remember that I own absolutely NOTHING.**

 **Reviews are like this story's lifeline and they're going strong, keep them coming guys!**

 **Please enjoy and happy reading . . .**

* * *

The first thing Clary did after the initial shock wore off was bolt to Jonathon's room. She pushed through the door without knocking or trying to see if he was alone, thankfully, he was. Clary shook him awake, slapping his back. He jolted up, groaning.

"What the fuck?" He asked, groggily.

"Jace is Valentine's child with Celine." Clary blurted and Jon stared at her for a moment, then he slowly sat up and crossed his legs, lacing his fingers together in front of him, and then he cracked his neck.

"Please. Explain." Jon said and Clary help up the black phone. Jon gripped it.

"Is this Seb's?" Jon hissed and Clary nodded quickly.

"Fucking hell, Clary. I thought you gave this shit over to the police." He snapped, anger rolling off of him.

"Anyway, Stephen called." Clary whispered and Jonathon just . . . stared. In fact, he stared for so long that Clary briefly wondered if he'd just completely tuned her out.

"Jon!" Clary very nearly yelled and he snapped out of it.

"Right, right, what did he have to say? Why the fuck was that motherfucker calling you?" Jon asked, his voice tight.

"He wanted to tell me that Lewis wasn't dead and that because I'm not the child of a Morgenstern and Jace is, he's fair game." Clary knew she wasn't making any sense, but Jon seemed to be following easily.

"Jace needs to know. He needs to know _everything_ and he needs to know it, now." Jon said, pushing from the bed. Clary just sat on the floor as he left his room. He didn't go to her room, though. He went to their mom's. After about ten minutes, Jocelyn came flustered into the room.

"Oh Clary." She said, sinking to the floor and wrapping her arms around her daughter's shoulders.

"We need to call the police." Jocelyn whispered and Clary wanted to protest, saying no, that would drive Lewis away, but the truth of the matter was. They couldn't do this alone. They tried that once and it cost her and Jon their freedom. So she nodded in agreement and Jocelyn grabbed the phone off Jon's desk, but it was snatched from her hands by . . . Jace.

"Robert is a detective." Jace took that moment to inform them.

"Then call him." Jocelyn says, wrapping her robe tightly around her. Jace dialed the number and spoke calmly into the receiver. Informing whoever was on the other line that they needed to get to the Morgenstern residence and quick. Jace hung up.

"Coffee?" Jocelyn asked and Jon snorted before turning and walking away. Jocelyn followed him, quickly. Clary stood and faced Jace. He stared at her.

"Are we related?" He asked, well, no one is beating around the bush there.

"No." She whispered, shaking her head.

"You're related to Jon, though. What did he tell you?" She asked, softly and Jace scoffed.

"He's pissed the fuck off. He told me that we have parents in common and that shit with your past is about to come up. I didn't know what to say to that, because at first, I thought he was drunk. Until I didn't see you in the room. So, we aren't related. Like in any way?" Jace asked and Clary watched him.

"My mother had an affair with the man who was married to your mother. Celine. Um, what we didn't know, at the time. Was that, Celine had an affair with my mother's husband, Valentine. Jon's father. She gave the baby up for adoption, because while men can do whatever they want in that world. Women would be out casted and Celine was already a manic depressive, she couldn't handle that. That baby, was you, I think. Stephen isn't trustworthy, at all. He's the one who kidnapped me and Jon. When I was ten. That's a long story, though." Clary stared at him.

"Where is Celine now?" Jon asked and Clary's lips quivered.

"Oh Jace." Clary breathed, covering her mouth.

"Please, please don't get your hopes up, please. Celine committed suicide ten years ago and Valentine was killed. Five years ago. They're dead." A tear fell down Clary's cheek and Jace was quiet.

"Well, isn't this just an informative night?" Jace spun on his heel and walked out of the room. Clary didn't move an inch until she heard voices from downstairs. Izzy, Alec, Magnus, and another male's voice. Clary recognized at Robert. She moved down the stairs slowly.

"What's happening?" Izzy shriek hit Clary's ears and she smiled softly. Entering the kitchen, she noticed that all of them were in their pajamas. Alec and Izzy were bickering and Magnus was standing in a corner next to Jace, both of them talking quietly.

"When I was ten, Jonathon was eleven and we were taken from our home by my father, Stephen Herondale. He had just figured out that Valentine Morgenstern, Jonathon's father, was not mine. My mother had an affair, but she told Stephen that the child, me, that I was Valentine's. Jon and I were taken to a building . . . warehouse and we were sold." Clary said, effectively silencing the entire room.

Jon sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "Valentine Morgenstern was a very dangerous man. He . . . ruled, to be short, the entire Northern Hemisphere. Mafia, guys, sounds like a bad movie, I know, but still. He was the Don of the Mafia. There are different groups, Russia, Irish, Spanish, Mexican, and so on, my father was in charge of all of them. He was _the_ Don. He was the one that the bosses of the bosses answered to." Clary stilled while Jon jumped up onto the counter with a huff.

"Sold?" Izzy whispered, was that all she got out of that?

"Yes, but we were luckier, than most. Um, Stephen ran the Italian section. And to those Italians, family is everything. So instead of sending me off to live with some sick psychopath somewhere foreign, he gave me to Sebastian. Seb was born without a conscience, pure evil. Just like Valentine. They were one in the same and Sebastian, even at eleven had absolutely no problem raping me. He was a cruel motherfucker long before he even realized how to truly use his . . . desires." There wasn't another word for that. Unless you used cruelties. Sebastian Morgenstern was a sadistic, sexual maniac.

To use the word child with him would have been a disgrace. The man never experienced a childhood because he was evil incarnated. There was no innocence in him. None. He was dead the day he was born.

"Jon was given to Valentine." Clary didn't say anything else on the matter. It wasn't her right, if they wanted to know what Jon went through, they would have to ask him and be willing to nurse a broken nose if things went south. With those questions, things usually did go south for Jon.

"Okay, what does this mean?" Robert asked.

"There is a man, my father's successor, it's an opinion about who's worse, Valentine or him. I'm going to go with him, my father wasn't a rapist, he was a businessman and his business was killing. This man, Lewis, is a rapist who gets off on the kill or the hunt, preferably both. Lewis taught Sebastian, but Sebastian was nowhere near the cruelty of Lewis, not in anyway. So imagine Sebastian, a thousand, billion times worse, because unlike Seb, Lewis won't chat. He won't threaten, if you're alone with him and he wants to kill you or rape you, he won't tell you, he'll do it. And you won't even know until you're dead." Clary rubbed her hands over her face.

"Listen, this is all horrible, but what does it have to do with us?" Robert asked, voice calm and demeanor respectable.

"My husband, Valentine, had stepped out of our marriage about a year before I had. He had an affair with my best friend, Celine. Celine got pregnant. The child was put up for adoption because in that world, women mean nothing unless you are the wife of a don or another member and if that wife steps out of her marriage, she's dead. It's over for her. A child is the most basic of proof. Stephen knew about the child, but he didn't care because Celine was nothing to him. So, he helped her put the child up for adoption, to save his own reputation. About seven months later, I stepped out of my marriage with Stephen and had Clary." Jocelyn explained.

"Okay, this is strange, but I'm still not seeing the connection with us." Robert said.

"Jace is that child. The child of Celine Herondale and Valentine Morgenstern. My half-brother." Jon said, giving Robert a look.

"Why in the fuck else would we be telling you this?" Jon grumbled.

"Clary and Jace are related?" Izzy shrieked and everyone look at her.

"No. We don't share parents, we share Jon. It would be like, two people married and then their parents meet, the wife's father fucks the husband's mother and then that mother gets pregnant. Are the wife and husband related? No, they just have slut parents. No offence mom." Clary said, looking over at her mom and Jocelyn sighed, waving her hand dismissively. Not offended.

"Okay." Izzy nodded, sitting down.

"Alright, what happens now? Does he have a target on his head?" Robert asked and Jocelyn snorts.

"Try the biggest of targets. He's fair game, in our world." Jocelyn says and Robert frowns.

"What does that mean?" He asks and Jocelyn shrugs.

"He's never been used. He didn't grow up in the world. He hasn't been betrayed like Clary and Jon have, so he's fair game. Lewis wants Morgenstern blood. Because being a Morgenstern in that world, you have an automatic reputation and Lewis is built on this reputation, it's failing, most likely. Because Valentine is dead and now, so is Sebastian. He has no tie to the Morgenstern family anymore. He needs an heir, preferably one of pureblood, which means incest, because _yes_ they do that. But Clary isn't a Morgenstern, so he couldn't pair Jon with Clary when they were in captivity together. If he finds out that Jace is a Morgenstern, he will take him. He will make him procreate." Jocelyn said simply.

"Actually, he might even use Clary." Jon murmured rubbing his jaw.

"What makes you say that? He can't use Clary, she'd have to go willingly." Jocelyn said and Jon made a contemplative face.

"Well, if it meant going with Jace . . ." Jon trailed off and gave his mother a look. Jocelyn frowned and looked at her daughter.

"You need to move to Aunt Dorothy's." Jocelyn said, without hesitation.

"No! Mom, that's insane." Clary snapped and Jocelyn huffed.

"It's not insane. If Jace gets captured, Lewis will most likely come find you. He won't be able to kidnap you again, and still keep the respect of his followers. That's law. You get one betrayal, they took it seven years ago. So, he'd tell you to come or he would force Jace to impregnate another girl. You would go without hesitation." Jon said, jumping off the counter and exiting the room.

"No, I would motherfucking not! I'm not having kids with Jace! This is insane, how did we get to this line of thinking?! Lewis doesn't even know that Jace exists, and even if he did, he's a Lightwood for all intents and purposes!" Clary screamed and Jocelyn huffed.

"Clary-." Jocelyn was cut off.

"No, mom! Celine's affair was never recovered and she hid the pregnancy, from everyone! Including her motherfucking parents! How on earth is Lewis going to trace that shit back to Jace?!" Clary was freaking out, because in all honesty, if that did happen and Lewis did get Jace. Clary would feel obligated to go with him. She understood the dynamics of that world. She'd convince herself that she was going to help Jace, truth was, Clary didn't know if she could handle Jace having a child with another woman . . . at the moment.

Jon reentered the kitchen with a black journal. "This is dads'. I took it when we escaped five years ago. I have read it and dad did know about another child. He didn't say it in those words, but . . ." Clary snatched the journal out of Jon's hands.

She opened it and turned to a page.

 _Lewis knows. Interesting how that little fucker could get so excited about knowing the existence of a bastard child . . ._

Clary slid to the floor and allowed the journal to drop from her hands. Lewis knows. _He knows_. Jace, Clary, Jon, Izzy, Alec, and Magnus. None of them were safe from the wrath of Simon Lewis.

•••

"There is another thing, we have to worry about." Clary whispered.

"What's that?" Jon asked and Clary looked up, meeting the eyes of her brother.

"Izzy." Clary whispered and Jon frowned.

"I don't get it." He snapped, his fists clenching, proving that he did get it.

"Well, if Jace would make me go back. Wouldn't Izzy make you?" Clary snapped and Jon huffed.

"No and last I checked, Izzy and I aren't making out in hallways." Jon snapped.

"Yes, but Sebastian _knew_ that you like her. Sebastian was Lewis's bitch, so what's to say that Lewis doesn't know that you like Izzy. Lewis takes Izzy and Jace. He's got Clary and Jon. He's got two couples for heirs. Isn't that what he has always wanted?" Clary asked and Jon's jaw grinded back and forth, so hard, she could hear his teeth scraping.

"Fucker won't get near them." Jon hissed.

"What are you going to big brother? Storm the compound? Release Armageddon? Start a motherfucking underground war?" Clary scoffed, but Jon's face didn't change.

"If I have to . . . yes."


	12. Chapter 12

Bad days. Everyone has them and everyone wishes they would just vanish into thin air, but when they come, the power of whatever emotion that grips you within its claws is near catastrophic. Especially, if you're Clary Fray. She was having a bad day.

Have you ever felt so damn tired that anything and everything around you just seemed to blur and grey into a swirling pile of nothing? Well, that's Clary's state of mind today. Simon Lewis was back. Izzy and Jace were in trouble. Her mother was paranoid to a point of hysteria and Jace was avoiding her.

She couldn't technically _blame_ him. If she found out she shared a sibling with someone that she'd acquired feelings for – she'd run too, but that's just the thing. She _did_ find that out. She was just as much tricked as he was.

Groaning, she fell face first onto her tear stained pillow case. It really needed a wash after the breakdown from last night. The breakdown that was responsible for her exhaustion today.

Several knocks occurred at her door throughout the day and each person was _never_ Jace. So, she gave up and just huddled under the blankets. Can't the world just . . . succumb into a black hole of oblivion? Wow, she's getting more and more morbid by the second.

Scowling at her own pathetic behavior, she rolled out of bed and stood on her feet, for about three seconds before sitting back down. There were no texts from him. No missed phone calls. She lost him and it sucked big, hairy balls. She winced at the internal image and rubbed her hands feverishly over her face.

The bad days were the worst, because nothing was there to distract her from succumbing to the memories of her past. Bad days are also when the need for pain would arise. The need to push away any and all thoughts of disgust or self-hatred. Pain usually helped with the numbness. It reminded her that she was real and not just floating through time and space.

Although, Clary had gone too long without needing the pain and she wasn't going to start now. Especially not for a boy. Even though the boy is the first person to get through her walls. Even though she happens to really, _really_ like him, he's still not worth it.

With newly found determination she rose from the bed, and stomped into her bathroom. After a quick shower and a change of clothes, which consisted of high waisted black jeans and a white crop top with a solid white top and long lace bell sleeves, she pulled her hair into a high ponytail and walked out of her room.

Jocelyn looked up from her cleaning spree long enough to smile at her daughter before going back to scrubbing the mantel with a tooth brush. Clary huffed at her mother's behavior and grabbed her bag. If she left now, she could make it to fifth period and even see Jace in seventh – no, no, who cares about Jace? She grinned – she didn't. _Sure, you don't_. Ignoring the little voice, she moved toward the front door.

"Love you!" Clary called over her shoulder and barely caught her mother's reply before the door shut behind her. She was determined and a bit terrified, but she was always good at swallowing fear. So, she did and started on her long walk to Idris High.

•••

She arrived just as fifth period ended and saw Jonathon in the halls. His relief was palpable as he saw her. They hugged and she pulled back first. "Thank god, you're out. I was worried I would have to buy the whole ice cream aisle for that to happen." He tried his hand at joking – it didn't work.

"Yeah." She muttered and glanced around. Everyone walked around as if nothing happened. She scowled. Guess that's how life works, right? A bad thing happens, cry and move on. Completely forget about two innocent girls who were taken far before their time. She inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled before casting Jonathon a quick glance and walking away.

When she arrived at her sixth period class she saw Jace in his seat, writing down notes onto his paper. _Pop Quiz_ , was written across the board in her Math teacher's chicken scrawl.

Clary took her seat next to him and he ignored her. Her throat tightened and the ease of familiarity she usually felt around him started to crumble, just as her walls sealed up tight. She tried to open her mouth and say something, but just like any other time she tried to talk – nothing came out.

A sense of loss and sadness filled her. She couldn't talk to him anymore. Her eyes lingered on his arms for a while as this new reality settled in. He was hurt. So was she. Why was this happening? What did she do to deserve it? Self-pity engulfed her senses and she allowed her eyes to glaze over with indifference before leaning back in her seat.

Her condition had her in its claws and she wasn't sure if it would ever release again. Sebastian's little stunt and Lewis's return had completely sent her spiraling backwards. Her demons were winning again, but she was still determined . . . kinda.

The teacher silenced the class and Clary stared down at her hands. "Class, the pop quiz today will be oral." He informed them and her chest tightened immediately as her throat turned dry and scratchy. _Oral_? An oral quiz in _math_? Since when did those occur?

The erratic beating of her heart was so strong in her own ears, that she was sure everyone else around her could hear it too, but they seemed oblivious. "Well, half of the quiz is oral. I will ask you a vocabulary question and you will answer. If you get yours right, then you pass that part of the quiz – if you don't, then the highest you can get is a fifty." He explained and groans fell from the lips of the students.

That was a bit harsh, but Clary could live with a fifty. What she couldn't live with was the fucking embarrassment that was sure to come her way. She should stand and leave, but she couldn't because that would draw too much attention. _In a second everyone's attention is going to be on you, anyway!_ Her mind screamed, but she was still glued to her spot.

Slowly and surely her body started to shake and her heart dropped a bit more each time a name was called and everyone gave their answer. After what seemed like a few seconds, when in reality was most likely ten minutes the teacher's gaze landed on her.

"If you divide the diameter of a circle in half, what do you get?" The man asked. It was easy. It was the radius and she tried to say that. Honest to dear god, she _tried_ , but she couldn't. Her lips were parted, but her throat was so tight it was as if invisible hands were trying to squeeze the life out of her. She sat there, feeling the heat of embarrassment explode throughout her body.

"Ms. Fray?" He asked and all eyes trained on her. She opened and closed her mouth a few times, even when her nose started to burn.

"Do you know the answer?" He asked her and she didn't like the way he said it. Condescending. Like she was a fucking idiot. She nodded, gripping the sides of her chair. The man looked less than amused while the students started to snicker around her. She was sure they thought it was a joke, but that didn't stop the embarrassment from clouding her brain.

"It's the radius." Jace answered and the teacher looked at him pointedly.

"Thank you, Mr. Lightwood, I'm fully aware, but the question was for Ms. Fray." He droned and the need to burst into tears nearly overwhelmed her.

"I'll ask another question." He said and Jace's pencil snapped. She glanced at his hands fisted around the broken wood, only to see them turn white from the sheer force of his grip.

"What is the formula used to find the circumference of a circle?" The man asked, moving closer to her. Why was he being so mean? No, not mean, just . . . being a teacher. A stupid teacher. Hadn't they been informed of her condition? If they hadn't, she's going to be very pissed off. You know, after the mental breakdown that she's experiencing was over.

His body language, glare, and voice caused a tear to slide down her cheek as a wave of panic overcame her. What was with this pressure? Sure, she didn't understand the question, but she didn't need to _cry_. The man noticed and he blinked, taken aback for a moment.

Jace stood and grabbed her bag, he tried to grab her, but she shoved away from his touch and fell onto her side. "Fuck, Clary." Jace grumbled and he tried to touch her again, but she kicked at his hands. _No, don't let them touch you. Don't let them touch you._

"Clary." Jace breathed as she moved quickly toward the door, finally standing.

"Mr. Lightwood!" The teacher exclaimed.

"Oh, shut up!" Jace yelled at him just as Clary got out. She ran and she ran fast. Clary had no idea what made her think she could go out in public during one of her bad days. She had no idea what made her think she could face a classroom full of students, let alone Jace. Tears blurred her vision as she ran. Ran from everything and everyone. There was just one problem – she didn't know where she was running to.

•••

"Clary?!" Jace's voice reached her ears as she sat on the curb of the school with her head between her knees while she rocked back and forth like a crazy person. She felt his hand and cried out, it came out hoarse and strained. She moved away quickly, from him and his touch.

"We're back to that?" He whispered, almost to himself and she ignored him.

"What happened? You were doing so well." He whispered, sitting down next to her, but keeping his distance. She glared at him. Well? He thought she was doing _well_? He left her. He abandoned her. Yes, she realized how crazy that sounded, but when you have literally _one_ person on this planet that you can truly count on and then another comes along and they leave without a word, that's abandonment, in her book, anyway.

"What? Why are _you_ mad at me?!" He yelled and she wiped a tear, still glaring at him. He fisted his hands and started to shake.

"I'm leaving you alone, just like you wanted. Why are you so pissed off at me?" He asked, his voice softer now. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she looked at him. He watched her confusion slowly contort her facial features.

"What? Clary, I got your text." He says, giving her a look that said she was the crazy person. Her throat, still tight, wasn't allowing her to call him out so she threw her hands up in the hair. In a 'what fucking text?!' gesture.

He reached into his pocket and yanked out his phone before handing it to her. She glanced at it before looking at him. Opening the device she searched for her name and found it. She read the text, stunned.

Her: _Hi, I know this is sudden, but we need to stay away from each other. It's not safe and I can't really look at you the same way as before. We share a brother, Jace, that's not right and I just need time and space. Please, just leave me be and let Robert keep you safe. It's the best thing for everyone._

Clary frowned at the text and shook her head at him. "You didn't send that?" He asks and she shook her head, again, before pulling out her own phone and opening to his name. She held it up and that text wasn't under his name.

"Huh?" Jace asked and Clary dialed Jon's number. She handed the phone and waved her hands around.

"Hey, Jon." Jace said slowly.

"Because she gave me her phone." He rolled his eyes.

"I think she wants you to come outside . . . yeah, the courtyard."


	13. Chapter 13

"I don't think he likes me much." Jace chuckled and ran a hand through his hair. Clary watched him with wet eyes. Not amused.

"Clary." He whispered, shaking his head.

"I was only listening to you, it, I mean – god, I thought it was _you_. I didn't agree though . . ." He trailed off and she continued to glare at him.

"You can't talk to me anymore?" He asked and she shook her head sharply, still glaring. His eyes softened to a point of pain that hurt Clary down to her very soul. She looked away and he raised a hand, running the pads of his fingers down her jaw. She flinched away and stood up before pacing a small distance in front of him.

"I think you're overreacting." Jace said and she growled at him. He shrugged.

"I do. I didn't know." He said, standing and she glared, even as her lips quivered. She pointed at him and then at herself and he shook his head.

"I don't speak sign language, sweetheart." He moved closer and she moved back. They continued that little dance until her back was flush against some car.

"Talk to me." He pleads, raising his hands on either side of her and blocking in her. Much to her relief, she didn't feel trapped. More annoyed, than anything.

She shrugged and opened her mouth several times. "Don't tell me you can't." He says, his eyes searching hers. She shrugged both of her shoulders and her eyes filled with a wave of fresh tears.

"Am I interrupting something?" Jon asked and they both turned to look at him. His eyes were on anything except them.

"No." Jace said and Jon smirked.

"I doubt that." He snapped.

"Don't you think it's weird? You're pissing at me for liking your sister and yet you like mine." Jace snapped.

"It's different, we _all_ share blood." Jon says.

"No, I don't share blood with Clary. I share blood with you and believe me, it's still fucking freaky." Jace snapped and Clary sniffed.

"Yes and I share blood with both of you. So, I find it weird. Give me a few days and a bit longer with Izzy's mouth – I won't find it weird then." Jon grumbled and Jace moved so fast that Clary barely had time to get between them before they were in each other's faces.

She shoved both of them apart with all her might, yet only succeeded in causing them to back up an inch. She whimpered in fear, glancing between the two of them. Without looking at her, Jon asks, "What's up with her?"

"She's pissed at me." Jace snapped and Jon glared.

"Great, you betrayed her then. What, couldn't keep it in your pants very long, _white knight_?" Jon sneers and Jace skirted around Clary, immediately barreling into Jon. Her shoulders slumped and she watched the boys struggle and wrestle each other to the ground. _They were more like brothers than they realized._ Clary thought, wryly.

After a moment, they shoved away from each other, breathing heavily and snarling. Clary stomped her foot and glared at them. "Jesus, what did you do?" Jon breathed, watching his sister.

"You can talk to me, right?" Jon asked and Clary opened her mouth, but no words came out. Jon turned and punched Jace's jaw. Jace jerked to the side and the sound caused Clary to cry out, but other than that, there was minimal damage. Which surprised Clary, because it either meant one of two things. Jon was dying and didn't have the strength to break his jaw or . . . cared about Jace. Hmm.

"Would you listen to me?!" Jace yelled at him and they glared at each other.

"Some dumbass texted me from Clary's phone, telling me to stay away from her, I thought I was listening to her wishes." He snarled in Jon's face, shoving him hard enough to send him sprawling to the ground.

"I didn't do it on purpose, Jonathon. To be completely honest, I'm not that freaked out about our arrangement. I didn't grow up with either of you, so I'm indifferent. Clary doesn't have my blood, that's _all_ I care about. Now, would you grow up?" Jace snaps and Jon fell back slightly, sitting on the pavement. He glanced at Clary.

"Who got ahold of your phone?" He whispered, softly and she shrugged.

"Great, just great. So, either Lewis got ahold of it somehow." Jon stood and brushed himself off before meeting Jace's eyes.

"Or there is already someone here working for him." Jon shook his head and Jace tensed.

"Which possibility is the most likeable?" Jace asked.

"Well, _brother_." He clipped.

"I would only trust the two people around you. Not Alec, not Magnus, not your parents, not Max, not Izzy . . ." he trailed off and cringed.

"No one. Trust no one." Jon ran his hands over his face and Clary slumped against the car. Jace stood between them, glancing from his newfound brother to the girl who is slowly, but surely sinking beneath his skin.

•••

Jace arrived at Clary's house late that night and was barely able to get up the first step before she opened the door and came out. He blinked at her attire that did nothing to hide her long, lean legs. He shook his head and met her gaze. She shut the front door and turned to him, crossing her arms over her breasts.

He wished she hadn't done that. She was distracting enough in a thin tank top. God, he felt like a pervert. _She's pissed at you, jackass! Say something!_ His mind roared at him.

"Hi." He said and nearly face palmed himself. _Hi? Is that the best you can do?_ Apparently.

She didn't respond and he hadn't expected her to. She was so very hurt, even though he was sure he hadn't done anything. He thought was only abiding by her wishes. Perhaps, he should have fought harder, but after everything with Sebastian and the other revelations – he didn't have the strength.

"It's my fault." He admits and she frowned.

"I should have called you or something, but I couldn't and I know that excuses mean nothing to you, but I'm trying Clary. I just want you to . . ." Talk to me. Look at me like before. He wanted a lot of things. Honestly, he wasn't too sure he'd ever get a single one.

"I like you." He says and her eyes flick up from the ground to meet his. He shrugged both of his shoulders.

"I have since you stormed away from me on the bus that first day. You know, not many girls have ever done that. They've fainted and swooned, sure." He smirked and her lips twitch. She poked her tongue in the side of her cheek to cover it up, and rolled her eyes away from him, in a gesture that said she was not amused. He knew better.

"But never run away. It was hot." He says and her lips twitched again.

"Have you ever thought that you frighten woman so much that running away just becomes physically impossible, because they freeze in their own fright?" She asks and his eyes grow wide. She clears her throat and shrugs.

"Not back to normal." She whispers, hoarsely.

"But the panic is gone." She assures in another hoarse voice. It was as if her vocal cords were fighting against her. He clears his throat.

"I've never thought of it like that." He informs her before moving to straddle the ledge of her porch. He watches her move closer to him like a frightened, abused kitten.

"Hey, Clary?" He asks and she glances up at him as she reaches the ledge and grips it next to him.

"You're stuck with me." He grinned against her cheek while leaning closer to her on his hands and swinging his legs.

"I realized that earlier – when you ran out of the classroom. Scared the fuck out of me, but you're stuck with me. You push, I'll push back. Swear." He held up a hand and she smirked at the gesture before looking away.

"Believe when I see." She mumbles, before turning around. He grabbed her upper arm and she flinched, but didn't move away. Slowly, he pulled her so that her back was facing him as his side faced her.

"Sweet dreams, beautiful." He whispered and she turned her head, slightly, before tilting her head back to look at him. He brushed his lips along hers, effectively causing them to part.

"Night, tiger." She murmurs, back and then she was gone, disappearing behind her front door. He smirked and watched it for a moment.

"That was sweet." Jon said, appearing out of nowhere and Jace nearly burst out of his skin.

"You are too fucking good, at that." He snapped and Jon shrugged, taking a drag from a cigarette.

"You know, she started talking after a few minutes of lying down. Don't think she'll do it as often, but . . ." he trailed off and shrugged.

"Hey, Jon, I was thinking." Jace said and Jon hummed.

"What?" He snapped.

"You said to trust no one, so, why should I trust you?" He asked and Jon slowly smile before taking another long drag and releasing it slowly.

"You shouldn't." He shrugged and watched Jace with interest.

"You shouldn't trust me, Jace. I'm not a good guy." He chuckled and moved closer. Jace wasn't intimidated, so he didn't move back.

"What you should trust, is that I will die for Clary and I'll kill anyone who tries to hurt her." Jon growled and Jace smiles.

"I guess we're on the same page with that, then." He smirked.

"I don't think you're capable, Jace." Jon admitted and Jace laughed.

"Oh, _brother_." He mimicked Jon from earlier. The older brother narrowed his eyes.

"You really don't know me, Jonathon. And you don't know what I'm capable of." Jace smiled.

"We share the same father, man. You don't think I could have gotten any of his genes?" Jace scoffed and moved around a now scowling Jonathon.

"Wouldn't let Clary know that." Jon commented and Jace turned to meet his gaze.

"Last son of Valentine raped her and made her his slave. To be completely honest Jace, when it comes to Clary, you want to possess the least amount of Valentine's genes as you possibly can." Jon sang in the night air.

"You possess his genes." Jace reminded him and Jon shrugged his massive shoulders.

"Yeah, but I didn't get the incest attraction. I got the bloodlust. And the only reason Simon Lewis isn't kissing my ass right now is because he knows I'll kill him without a single word." Jon took another drag and stretched. Jace frowned and blinked at the ground.

"What if I got it, too?" He asked and Jon looked up, sharply.

"The bloodlust? The rage? You think I can't pull a trigger, Jon?" Jace asked.

"No, I know you can't." Jon answered, his green gaze igniting like fire in the soft glow of night.

"And I know you're wrong." Jace answered with a cruel twist of his lips. Then, he turned and walked away without another word.

•••

Izzy paced the expanse of Clary's room that next night. She watched as the brunette muttered to herself while creating a sizable draft in the floor. Jon came to lean against her doorframe, completely shirtless and eating an apple.

Jace arrived shortly after, also shirtless, but he leaned on the frame above, his arms extending and flexing with strain as he leaned forward. Clary stared at the two boys and for the first time she could see a minimal resemblance. Not in their physical features, but in their eyes. Both held the same darkness that lurked just beneath the surface.

Both boys held unimaginable strength and beauty, but Jonathon held the hair color of his father and Jace obviously contracted the color of Celine's. Jace was also a couple inches taller than Jonathon, but they were the same width. Izzy froze when she saw them and stared with wide eyes.

"Whoa." Izzy cast Clary a glance that Clary really didn't want to agree with, but did. Izzy wasn't related to any of the boys in front of them and that kind of annoyed Clary. She didn't want Jonathon, never had and never will, but still, there was a complication there with Jace and she didn't like it.

"What?" They both asked at the same time and Izzy just shrugged.

"Nothing, I just . . . I can see the relation." She admitted and both boys sneered at each other before Jon made his way into Clary's room and over to Izzy.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked her and she scowled at him.

"I may be forced to have babies!" Izzy shrieks and Jon stared at her, blankly.

"Okay, but that obviously hasn't happened yet. Say, Izzy, have you been around Clary a lot, lately?" Jon asked, cocking his head to the side. Only Jace and Clary seemed to see the suspiciousness within Jon's question. Both scowled at their brother.

"Like, in her room – on her phone?" Jon asked and Jace growled, warningly.

"I'm missing something." Izzy said and Clary rolled her eyes. _So damn smart, she is_.

"I use Clary's phone sometimes, only when I want to look at her art, though. Why?" Izzy asks and Clary shook her head. Izzy was a lot of things, but a traitor and a bad person weren't on the list.

"Someone sent me a text telling me to stay away from Clary, but they sent it from Clary's phone." Jace said and Izzy blinked.

"Who was it?" She asked and they all stared at her.

"Me? You think it was _me_?! I've been rooting for them!" She shrieks and Jon rolled his eyes.

"You are a fucking bitch." Izzy snapped at Jon and he cocked an eyebrow. Clary giggled in her pillow.

"Maybe it's one of the several whores you bring home." Izzy snapped and Jace cocked an eyebrow.

"That is actually possible." Jace said and they all looked at him. He shrugged.

"What? You two have been out of that world for years now. You're not bound to know every face. What if you brought someone home and in the middle of the night while you were sleeping they snuck into Clary's room?" Jace suggested.

"Impossible." Jon says, simply.

"Why? Are you just that good, Jon?" Jace growls and Clary places a hand on his shoulder, it eases him down.

"First of all, I don't sleep with a woman – I fuck them and then they leave. Whether she wants to or not. Secondly, I haven't had sex with anyone since Izzy's breakdown and third, Clary has been fighting for her life since the age of six. She doesn't sleep _that_ well." Jon rolled his eyes. Jace deflates and Clary bites her bottom lip.

"Well . . ." Clary trailed off and they all look at her.

"I've been trying to sleep better and I've been taking sleeping pills. They're all natural, but I pass out pretty deeply." She confesses and Jon winces.

"Your mother's guest, maybe?" Izzy asks, softly. Jon and Clary exchange a glance.

"You think my . . ." Jon trails off, Clary's eyes widen and then all four of them were running out of the room.

"Mom!" Jon screamed and there was a loud crash from downstairs. They got to the living room to see Jocelyn trying to clean up the vase she obviously broke.

"Have you had sex lately?" Jon asked and Clary shoved him.

"What he means, is have you had anyone over since Sebastian?" Clary whispers and Jocelyn blinks, then frowns.

"Just Luke . . . but he's harmless." Jocelyn assures.

"Mom, has he ever been in this house without you watching him? Have you fallen asleep, has he gone to the bathroom . . . what?" Jon asked and Jocelyn's face pales.

"What happened?" She whispered and Jon quickly explained the situation.

"About a week ago, he needed to use the bathroom and the one downstairs was clogged so I let him go up to mine." She was wringing her wrists and Clary buried her face in her hands.

"I found him, lingering in the hallway. I didn't think much of it, because he wasn't near any of your rooms . . ." She slumped to the ground, muttering incoherently under her breath.

"It's okay, mom." Jon assured and Jocelyn shook her head.

"I swear he's a good guy. I swear it. He's. A. Good. Guy." She pleads and Clary bit her bottom lip.

"It's okay, mom. Honest. We're going to go to bed. You should try too." Clary says and everyone glances at her, she shook her head sharply at them. They all fell silent.

"Can Izzy and Jace stay over?" Clary asked and her mom agreed, seemingly distracted.

"You liked him." Clary whispered and Jocelyn shrugged.

"It doesn't matter." She kissed Clary's cheek.

"I love you guys." She left the room and Jon glanced at the clock.

"It's nine. I'm old, but not that old." Jon said to Clary and she glared.

"This is a small town. Do you guys know where Luke lives?" She asked and Jace nodded slowly.

"We're going there and figuring shit out. The lead is worth the chance. We can do it." Clary whispered to Jon and he shrugged. Jace and Izzy seemed less enthusiastic.

"Whatever. Let's go."


End file.
